Episode Report Card
Omar G: C+ | Grade It Now!
Alien Vs. Predator-Dork

Commercials. They bore me. I shall fast-forward.

Talon. Nighttime. Oh, jeez. Guess who's taking a shower? I'll give you a clue. She needs a second bar of soap to get her whole body washed. Lois arches her body all over the place through the silhouette-showing shower curtain. We see Lois's back, and then, as she turns, how her entire face still has all its makeup on. Invisalyin'-Vision. Invisalyin' is, like, totally getting laid tonight. There's no reason for stalking, bub. Lois notices that something may be wrong. She's got a bad feeling about this gratuitous shower scene. So she arches her back sexily again. I wish I were just making all this up. Lois hears the bathroom door close. She slowly turns off the dual faucets. Peeks outside. "Hello?" she calls. She sees movement under the door. Lois gets out, starkers, and grabs a big metal "body massager" to club someone on the head with vibration. There's a towel right there on the hanger, but Lois doesn't bother to grab it. She'd rather strike with the awesome totality of her naked bod. You know, this scene makes even less sense than the scenes that, by their very unscientific nature, aren't supposed to make sense. Lois throws open the door and raises her giant metal massager. Clark is standing there. He looks at her naked body. Then stops short of asking for a surgery referral. Lois clears her throat, then shuts the door. Clark wonders, "Was there a person standing behind those things?" Lois finally grabs a towel, while Clark, on the other side of the door, walks off, stunned. Not quite Lana naked, is it? Lois emerges. "What are you doing here?" she barks. Clark says that he's been calling and knocking on the door. "How long have you been in there?" he asks. "About an hour and a half," she says. Whoa. She's part saline, though, so she needs all that hydration. Lois asks Clark whether he was just in the bathroom. Clark says he just walked in. Lois swears someone was just in the bathroom watching her. Clark says that it was Invisalyin'. Lois is annoyed that Clark is blaming him. Clark warns her to stay away from that dude. She whines that Clark is always "lobbing a grenade" at everyone she dates. Maybe it's more that he's waving a spear in their direction. "Quiet," Clark tells her. Yes! I've been waiting for that. Clark uses his super-hearing to listen to Invisalyin's heartbeat. "He's here," Clark whispers. Clark hears clothes rustle, as someone leaves the room. He follows. Clark goes downstairs, and hears scattered heartbeats from Talon customers. He walks down the stairs. A waitress gets pushed aside and drops her tray. "Hey!" she yells. The back door swings open. Clark pursues.

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