Commercials. Mission Impossible: III. Tom Cruise makes me so sad I don't even have a joke for it.
Smallville Medical Center. I think, when they are dying, that I want my recaps to be treated here. Clark gets off an elevator. I have no idea why he's here. Oh, yeah. To spy on Lana. He looks into a room with the blinds open and sees Lex lying in bed. Lana is there, holding his hand. Lex is unconscious. Lana notices Clark. She pulls her hand away, and comes outside to talk to the big, dumb alien. Clark says that Chloe told him what happened. "How's he doing?" Clark says, making it sound like he's genuinely concerned. He got the shit choked out of him, Clark, how do you think he's doing? Lana says it's lucky Lex's trachea didn't collapse. Years of exercise. Lana says that Lex is sedated. Clark asks where Papa Luthor is. Lana says that he's flying back from Singapore. Clark tells Lana that she's a good friend for staying here like this. Unlike Clark. Lana takes a long time to say that someone should be with Lex when he wakes up. Dickishly, Clark says, "Yeah. Of course." Clark asks whether the police know who did the choking. Lana says she gave the police a full description. Ah, so she did see the dude. The editing was a bit unclear on that. Clark asks whether Lana was there when it happened. She lies, and says that she was returning some books when she walked in and saw what was happening. "Um...what did the guy look like?" Clark asks. Did he have big chokey hands? Lana says that he had dark hair and dark eyes and had a black trenchcoat. Wow, that's amazingly helpful. The police must have about 100,000 people in custody. Lana says the dude seemed to vanish.
The Talon. Lois is pouring about a gallon of sugar into her cup of coffee. She turns and there's Invisalyin'. "Quite a sweet tooth you got there," he says. Lois says that her dentist would agree. Invisalyin', wearing a black trenchcoat, says that he was on his way out of town, but couldn't get the girl with the smile and cavities out of his mind. Lois blames her blushing on sunburn. Invisalyin' says that if she's not too busy with the aloe vera, she can go with him to see Coldplay. She asks whether they're playing in Metropolis. He says he chartered a plane to Chicago, and that they can have dinner on the plane: "You like Italian?" You know if you go you have to sleep with him, right Lois? It's like in the rulebook for millionaires. Lois says that he doesn't have to play the rich card to impress her. He says that it's not a card; he works for companies that take very good care of him. Lois wonders whether she should get a job in the headhunter business. He says it can get a little cutthroat. Oh, hardy fucking har. Lois says that she'd love to jetset, but she's just as happy going to Joe's for some "foggybottom burgers." What the fuck is that? She wants to go to Washington instead? Invisalyin' touches Lois's hair, and says they can have the burgers on the plane. He says that he'll pick her up at 6. She says she'll be wearing her glass slippers. But can glass withstand the sound of Lois's voice?