Bo Duke has gone from farm rube to total political rube, wearing the cheaply pressed suit of a man way in over his head on the campaign trail. Someone else must have noticed, too, because in the first segment, an assassin tries to take him down at a political rally. And who is pulling the trigger? Lois Lane? Wow, she's really going to have to be a lot more objective than that if she's ever going to be a reporter. We go back in time to discover that the plot against Bo (the "Bo must go" plot) is led by three young workers in the Lex Luthor campaign, one of whom is a really, really dumb girl with a huge crush. The Manchurian Dumb-Ass attacks Bo in his barn before deciding that it would be even better just to kill Bo off so that Lex will win the state election. When Lex finds out, he rebuffs the girl even though she tells him about her shenanigans while flashing her boobies. Meanwhile, MamaKent has doubts about the race, but is still trying to be supportive. She turns down an offer of financial assistance from Papa Luthor even though she's sorely tempted. Lana, who is asking lots of questions of Clark about astronomy, whines that they haven't had sex since Clark had that near-death experience that gave him back his powers. Clark is like, "Oh yeah. Sex. I remember that. Huh." He's afraid he's going to punch right through her cervix like a speeding...uh...projectile. Clark stupidly tells Chloe about all this, putting her in an absurdly awkward position, albeit one in which her cervix is in much less danger. Clark apologizes to Lana for being less than honest (even though he lies in his apology) and for not nailing her sooner. Back to that assassination plot: Lois, who somehow became Bo's campaign manager, is forced at gunpoint to wield the rifle. She shoots, but Clark saves the day, of course. In the end, MamaKent decides to take Papa Luthor's offer after all. Either that or she's just getting into his limo at the end for some nookie that doesn't smell like it's been around the cows all day.
Could it be we're already ten episodes into Season 5? Am I the only one who feels that with the exit of Professor SoFine, that there's not really much going on? Folks running for state senator? Lana trying to figure out Clark's secret? It's not that things suck, they just aren't really that exciting, right? Guess they'll have to kill someone off.
Nonetheless, we bravely venture forth. Er, fifth, sorry. I forget myself.
We open the episode with people off-camera cheering as someone opens the case to a dismantled rifle. There's .308 "Performance Ammunition." It's that weekend performance ammunition that helps you fire your gun for thirty-six hours at a time. A person wearing gloves screws the pieces of the rifle together. The sniper rifle comes together nicely. But will the plot?
We cut to someone holding up a blinding red-white-blue sign that reads "VOTE KENT for STATE SENATE." Someone on the Kent campaign staff paid good money for those oversized foam hands that say "#1!" There are quite a lot of people at this rally, and they're completely jazzed because there's nothing else to do in Kansas except follow state politics.
Cut back to the would-be assassin, who is loading up the sniper rifle with those very large bullets. Johnny Smith, no!
Bo Duke is introduced as the next state senator of Kansas. A "KENT" sign humorously shows Bo wearing a rugged denim jacket and passing pleasing wind. Bo dazedly wanders onstage. He's wearing a business suit. His hair is combed. He waves like a Kennedy. And the crowd goes wild. Bo smiles to MamaKent, who is beaming from the audience. She wanted to bring muffins for everyone, but she passed out after the first twenty dozen. Bo thanks everyone for coming out this evening, and the gay constituency goes, "Haaaaay!" As do the gay horses when asked what they eat. Heh heh, I love that joke. Bo is impressed that everyone showed up to hear some farmer talk about corn subsidies. Bo, you had us at "cor." Especially those of us who were fans of Penfold on Danger Mouse. The crowd doesn't really laugh. It sort of uncomfortably shifts and titters as if everyone's thinking, "Good God, that's not his platform, is it?" Bo reaches into his pocket for the rest of his killer jokes. "Uh, I just flew in from Smallville, and boy is my asshole puckered from all the cornholing! No, wait, damn! Wrong set of notes!" Bo says that when he told his family he wanted to run for office, they were surprised. He says they didn't really understand...long pause...why he wanted to run. We cut to a shot of the sniper cocking the rifle. The tip of the gun pokes out up high in the rafters. Bo's gigantic head somehow fits in the scope of the gun. Bo says he's running to help the rich as well as the poor (yeah, good luck with that, senator) and to put the heart back in the heartland. Also, the Vern back in government and the elation back in legislation. The audience totally digs his clever wordplay. They're looking forward to state bills that have a strong storyline and likeable characters. Bo kisses his note cards at MamaKent. She kisses back with her actual hands.