Smallville
Smallville

Episode Report Card
Omar G: C | 649 USERS: C+
YOU GRADE IT
Pudding Out

Chloe looks up and notices a security camera that's swiveling to point toward them. A red light on it blinks. A door opens. PhotoJerkalist emerges from a Room 222. Chloe tries to rush over so that he doesn't let the door close. She asks if he's playing along, too. "Playing along?" he asks. Man, his hair looks like it was sculpted by surfers. He tells her he planned it all. "You brought us here?" Chloe asks incredulously. He says that just because it's the last day of school doesn't mean they can't stay there forever, and starts to walk away. Chloe pulls his arm and asks him why he'd want to stay stuck in high school when there's so much else out there. Ugh. The clumsy metaphor episode. This is exactly what I want to spend my weekend watching. PhotoJerkalist tells Chloe that he thought she of all people would understand, since she's editor of The Torch and was Homecoming Queen. That was a sick joke, my friend. He says that Chloe had everything in high school; all that's left for her outside is a lifetime of disappointments. She didn't even have a steady boyfriend, dude. What are you talking about? PhotoJerkalist is pretty pleased that there won't be any disappointment in this space.

Chloe tells PhotoJerkalist that he can't just keep them all there: "You have to move on!" He tells her that some people didn't get into their dream colleges like she did. When you're looking at a stack of rejection letters, "moving on" means working at a video store. That sounds kind of fun. You could be like Randall from Clerks. Chloe asks how PhotoJerkalist can be sure that the rest of them will go along with this. He turns evilly at some dorky kid is taking stuff out of his locker. "Wendell?" PhotoJerkalist purrs. Wendell tries to walk away. PhotoJerkalist yells at Wendell to "come here!" You'd better do it, man. I bet this guy gives a mean wedgie. Wendell swears that he didn't do anything. PhotoJerkalist says that Chloe wants to know what happens when you don't play along. Wendell begs not to be hurt. PhotoJerkalist reaches out his hand and grabs Wendell by the wrist. This guy actually does look like the teenaged version of the Wendell who throws up on the bus on The Simpsons. Wendell's hand turns into that milky putty color. His whole body is covered in yogurt. His blue eye stares out. It's pretty gross. Heh, talk about a milky complexion! He has a certain dairy-aire. I hope Wendell doesn't stay like that too long or he may sour on the experience. Well, I'm officially having too much fun with this. PhotoJerkalist turns back to Chloe and tells her she's better off here. Menacing music plays as he promises to save a seat for her at lunch. Wendell's hand is still sticking out. "Stop! In the name of Yoplait!" Chloe is appropriately frightened.

Smallville

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