Improbably, Lex, Lois, and Kara are all in Detroit together. Lex has apparently befriended the amnesiac Kara (who's been living as a waitress named Linda), while Lois has come to the rescue to expose Lex's charade. The whole thing is derailed, however, when a busboy who likes Kara tries to defend her from Lex, and the two shoot each other. Lex comes out of the deal worse off: he gets shot right in the head, which should kill him instantly, right? Not so fast. Thanks to the miracle of television narrative, Lex is anonymously transported from Detroit to Smallville Medical Center with a bullet lodged in his head and somehow, dude survives. What follows is even sillier: Lois and Kara are being held captive by the busboy, and Clark, Chloe, and Papa Luthor decide that the only way to find them is either to revive Lex or to use dangerous LuthorCorp technology to burrow into his memories. Say whaaaaa!?
Clark decides to go into Lex's brain to recover Kara and Lois's location. He's told that several people have died trying to use the technology. Clark thinks he's immune because he's super, but we all know his brain's not so invulnerable. Inside Lex's brain, Clark finds a sad little boy named Alexander, the last bit of humanity left in there. Alexander witnesses some pretty intense fighting between Mama and Papa Luthor over something called "the Veritas project." Clark finds Lois and Kara's location, but not before BrainLex discovers Clark in there and forces him to watch BrainLex do the nasty with a very willing memory of Lana. Dude, that's fucked up! Just as he's about to find his way out, Lex dies, taking Clark with him. Chloe uses her healing power to bring them both back, right in front of an amazed Papa Luthor. Clark is about to exit the brain, but little Alexander begs him not to go; the evil, grown-up Lex has been trying to kill Alexander off. Clark promises to look out for him and that they'll meet again. He goes to rescue Kara and Lois, which takes all of ten seconds.
Chloe -- dead for eighteen hours from using her healing power -- returns to life at the Talon apartment. She tells Clark that she's more confused than ever about her abilities, and doesn't know if she'll use them again. Clark visits Lex and tries to advise him to follow his good side. Lex isn't too thrilled with that idea. Papa Luthor -- still rattled by Lex's close call -- tells his son that he loves him. Lex, long-abused, isn't hearing much of that, either. But Lex does warm up to Kara, who still has amnesia and doesn't know about her own powers yet. She thinks that Clark is hiding something, and trusts Lex much more. Lex tells her that he's got a team of researchers who'll help her to recover her memories: he plans for them to find the truth together.
The writers' strike is over! Yay! But as far as this show goes, the bad news is that after this three-episode affair, the show goes back into hiatus for at least a few weeks. But we were just warming up! The engine was just reaching crankination! We were all greased up and...you know what? Let's hold that thought until March/April when there's more episodes.
We open on a city called "Detroit," if the title card is to be believed, but instead of real establishing shots, we're in a dark, rainy junkyard that could easily be "Warehouse For Rent, Vancouver." Foreboding, intrusive music tells us this scene isn't going to be a lighthearted romp through the soulful heart of Motown. Lightning flashes and thunder crashes. Improbably, we see Lex Luthor and Lois Lane running along together, having an adventure. Lex is holding a pistol in one hand and some gadget in the other. As Lois follows, she yells that this weather sucks. She asks Lex where they're going. Lex tells her to feel free to get lost. Lois says she never planned on being Lex's "Sundance Kid" ("Dumbshit Kid?"), especially not in the "Armpit of Motor City." The thought of Lois trapped in an actual armpit entertains me briefly. Lois asks what makes Lex think that Kara is here. Lex, still staring at his electronic device, says that Kara's necklace emits a GPS signal. He says that she's somewhere within a hundred yards. The PDA-like device shows a green-tinted map. "You LoJacked her?" Lois asks, accusingly. Lex says that Kara has amnesia and that she could wander off if she lost her memory again. That makes...no real sense, but Lois buys it completely. Lois decides to set off on her own to find Kara. It's not so hard when it's only 100 yards, is it, Lois?
Lex, who must have eyes like a robot, sees something on the ground. He picks it up. It's Kara's silver bracelet, with a little Kryptonian Superman symbol on it. We cut to Lois, still wandering around in the rain. I don't give the show credit for restraint too often, but I'm surprised we're not seeing her in a thin white T-shirt or a soaked low-cut Lycra top. Lois spots Kara, standing behind a chain link fence. Lois asks if Kara is all right. "Do you know me?" Kara asks, confused. She says that a guy named Finley locked her in this chain link fence area to protect her. She asks Lois to help her out. "Does MacGyver blush every time he walks past me?" Lois asks. I'd have a lot better answer for that question if I knew what the fuck Dumbshit Lois was even talking about. It's like English is her third or fourth language, behind "snarkcasm" and "pop-culture misreferencing." Lois says she'll get something to "jimmy" the lock. The show resists the urge to give Kara a flood of memories when hearing the word "Jimmy." Oh, I'm sure they thought of it, though. Lois turns and Finley, a young guy, is standing there holding a gun and pointing it at her. Kara tells him to put the gun down. What might bring this situation to a head, I wonder?
"Put the gun down!" Lex yells, pointing his own weapon. Ah, yes. That'll do it. Finley grabs Lois clumsily and holds her hostage, pointing his own gun at Lex. Finley asks "Bald Man" if it's really worth getting Lois killed to get to him. It really, really, really is, dude. You don't even know. Lois yells out to Lex that it's a rhetorical question. Shoot them both, Lex! Shoot 'em in the head! Finley calls Kara "Linda" and tells her he won't let her get hurt. Can't we go inside and discuss this where it's not raining and they might have nice warm scones? Lois stupidly tries to break free. Finley punches her in the mouth. Lex and Finley both fire their guns. Finley is shot in the shoulder and falls back. We cut to Lex, in slow motion. His gun hand is lowered. We see the gun drop into a puddle of rainwater. Lex falls to his knees. We pan up slowly to see his face. There's a bullet hole dead center on his forehead, just an inch above the nose. Lex falls forward. "Leeeeeex!" Kara screams. We do a close-up on Lex's shot face. He's lying on his side on the cold street, looking peaceful, at least.