Smallville

Episode Report Card
Omar G: B- | Grade It Now!
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Clone Wars

"What about the time my mom got me a red and green dirt bike for my seventh birthday?" says Adrian. Now he's standing in the room with Lex and Boy Editor. He says he rode that thing everywhere. He thought he could pedal -- "Until the chain wore out," Boy Editor finishes. Adrian says that he saw Boy Editor's picture in the paper one day, and realized they had a lot in common. Lex tries to stop him, but Boy Editor wants to hear what Adrian has to say. "How do you have my memories?" he asks. "Because Lex made me," he answers. Adrian says that when that didn't work, Lex made Boy Editor. Gabriel, Gabriel, Gabriel, I made you out of clay! Boy Editor is confused. Adrian calls him the perfect clone. Lex says he's lying. "You're me?" Boy Editor asks. Adrian gets right in his face and says that they have the same DNA and the same backstory. Adrian says that Boy Editor worked and Adrian didn't. Define "work" -- because Boy Editor seems like he's pretty shitty at his job. Boy Editor and Adrian go face to face. Boy Editor starts to talk about Papa Luthor giving him up for adoption. When he says, "my Harvard degree," Adrian says it, too. "The paper," they both say. The effect is supposed to be creepy, but it's actually just silly, like a Drama for Non-Majors acting exercise. It doesn't help knowing that the guy playing Adrian is an actual actor, and not a special effect double of the actor playing Boy Editor. Lex just stares, vaguely curious. Even he is bored with this explosive revelation. Boy Editor says it's all lies. "Am I even your brother?" he asks Lex. Or his brother from another? Maybe a brother from another planet? Adrian is offended that he was created from a test tube and kept like a lab rat just so that Lex could have a brother. He asks if that's why Lex couldn't get rid of him. Lex suddenly snaps: "You're not my brother!" he yells at Adrian. Lex busts out a gun and shoots Adrian right in the chest. "You're a mistake!" he yells. Adrian gasps and falls to his knees. He lets go of the detonator. It flashes red rings. It is made from an Xbox 360! I knew it!

In the elevator, the "COMPOSITION 4" package begins to blink. A counter begins at one minute and starts counting down. Now, if you make a secret bomb, would you really want it to beep one minute before it goes off, thereby warning the person you want to blow up? Chloe and Jimmy get up from the floor and start banging on the elevator door. Nobody's bothering to try to get them out, still. We look up an elevator shaft. No help is coming.

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Smallville

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