Smallville

Episode Report Card
Omar G: D+ | 2 USERS: D-
YOU GRADE IT
Re-re-Pete

We cut to the band in the club. It's One Republic, which would make your high school government teacher smile. Pete doesn't yell, "Yeah, One Republic!" but you know he's thinking that. The band plays something that sounds like every other emo rock crap you might hear on FM these days. Boy, am I old. Pete returns to watch the band from the back of the room. We see Kara doing the robot. Not the dance The Robot, just a weird, mechanical bobbing motion that could be called dancing, were it not so digital. The band is very lucky to have a young Colin Quinn as its lead singer. Pete is standing directly behind Kara. He busts open a green package of Stride gum. I have to tell you: in preparation for recapping this episode, I bought my first ever pack of Stride. I got the fruity orange pack and...it lasted about from the cash register to my parked car. The flavor was fleeting and a little weak, much like this episode. Maybe I should have gotten the minty flavor. It does come in a little fold-out case that is amusing for about 1.5 seconds.

Pete takes out a piece of gum and sticks it in his mouth. It's glowing bright green, and you know what that means. There's trouble afoot! In the mouth! And it's going to be a sticky situation. By which I mean it's a stick of gum and that gum itself is sticky. The observation works on myriad levels. Pete smiles as we hear a chime and his head seems to grow slightly. Strange. He, too, is dancing. Wow, that band is really pretending to be wailing. Jimmy returns, sans the "bevvys" he promised, and tries to take a camera-phone picture of Kara as she stands, digital dancing. No real camera, Jimmy? The song the band is playing is longer than the Patriot Act. Overhead, where some speakers are tied to some pipes, a cord breaks. The giant speakers are going to fall on Kara. Pete notices and reaches out his hands to help her. They reach out in a Stretch Armstrong move, elongating until they reach Kara. Pete pulls her back as the speakers fall. The band stops playing. "Hey, what happened?" the lead singer asks, clearly unconcerned unless it happened to a groupie he planned to bone later. Don't worry. You're on The CW. Nobody saw that. Jimmy, still gripping Kara by the arms, breathes heavily. Kara thanks him. She walks away with just that. Pete stares at his hands. Stretchy Man! Jimmy watches Pete from afar. He looks down to find that he captured a perfect picture of Pete's long arms rescuing Kara. He starts to smile. Because his girlfriend almost got squashed.

Opening credits. Commercials. Stride gum is advertising during this show, too. What serendipity!

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Smallville

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