Episode Report Card
Omar G: D+ | 2 USERS: D-

Commercials. 21. Vegas, baby!

Daily Planet, daytime. Chloe is at her desk, talking on the phone to someone about some server problems she's having. She complains that she can't get to her files. Jimmy approaches Chloe's desk. He asks if she got his mail. The one in which he describes how he was totally on a date with Kara last night. It's the best e-mail ever! Chloe says she's been in I.T. Hell (is that like I.P. Freely?) all morning. Chloe says that the network has her surfing in the slow lane. Chloe opens the one new e-mail she has. It may be the slow lane, but the photo from Jimmy's phone opens quickly. It's a perfectly composed shot of Pete reaching out his long-ass arms to pull Kara back. Chloe double-clicks to zoom in and recognizes Pete. Jimmy says that the dude's elastic limbs are going to slingshot the story to the front page. Chloe says it's Pete Ross, her best friend from high school. She says he was her friend even back before Clark. Jimmy surmises that she ditched Pete for Clark. Er, no. Chloe, distracted, says they were all best friends. Jimmy says Pete's going to be a superstar. He's the first person with meteor powers to be willing to get interviewed. Jimmy stumbles over the words "meteor freak" and corrects himself to say, "biologically enhanced individual."

Chloe can't believe Pete wants to be interviewed. Jimmy thinks this will be a PR boon to the infected. He says Pete is smart (not so much), funny (no) and has a great story (one with potential, maybe). Chloe says she appreciates Jimmy's effort to be meteor-socially-conscious, but she thinks the public is going to turn Pete into a circus freak. Jimmy says it's just an interview. Chloe stares at the weird photo again. Chloe offers to add a little "purple prose" to Jimmy's seemingly hand-written draft of a story. Jimmy tells Chloe to go ahead and sprinkle her "Hemingway dust" (shotgun suicide dust, maybe?) and that he's going to the Stride factory to interview some of Pete's comrades before they start their next gig. They're roadies for a show that never leaves town. Nice work if you can get it. Chloe makes a phone call. She tells Clark they have a problem and it appears to be growing. Chloe tries to do something on her computer and gets an "access denied" message. Then she sees a box that reads, "uploading in progress." It's nice when someone hacks into your computer to steal files, but makes sure to send you a giant, legible pop-up messages to tell you it's happening. So forthright, these hackers. The upload is now complete.

We cut to the same image of Pete, but now it's on someone else's laptop. The camera pivots to show us Lex Luthor staring at the screen, his brow furrowed. He's thinking, "I understand how Kryptonite could make your body stretch, but your clothes too? That's some powerful-ass gum." He's sitting in his new office at The Daily Planet. Lex knows it's Pete and wonders what's this guy doing back on the show? Maybe if he sticks around, I won't have to do Season Eight. Someone walks in. It's Chloe, who enters without knocking and does her Self-Righteous Walk Of Truthiness. Lex snarks that she must be taking advantage of his open-door policy. Chloe says the I.T. department told her that Lex is monitoring everything that happens on the newsroom computers. Chloe says that unauthorized surveillance is totally unethical. Luckily, if you own a company, surveillance and monitoring is implied. That's why employees shouldn't don't do stuff they don't want your bosses to see on their work computer. Lex says those are pretty big words for a cub reporter. "Shouldn't you be using those to write stories?" he asks. Chloe implies that she's doing to write a story about office espionage. Good luck getting that published. Chloe must not realize that she's an employee at a company and using their resources. Therefore, she has no personal rights to privacy on that equipment whatsoever. Lex says he thought Lois had first dibs on conspiracy theories. "You hacked into my computer and copied my files, Lex!" Chloe yells, "I have rights!" Er, no. No, you don't. Lex agrees with me. He says she doesn't have rights; she has responsibilities. Lex circles around the desk. He says he owns everything in the building. He raises his voice, saying that if Chloe doesn't like the way he's running things, she can go find out if The Inquisitor has nicer work policies. "You're excused," he tells her. Chloe, making a snideface, exits, slamming the door behind her. Well, that was a win-lose in Lex's favor, wasn't it?

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