Wonder Coach's office. He's watching Clark on video, where Clark is doing his girly leap over the tacklers. Principal Smooth enters, wearing a not-quite-so-fashionable blue suit jacket with khaki pants. Coach turns off the TV. "Ah. How's my favorite football fan?" he asks. Y'all -- I think he's being sarcastic. Smooth says that one of the players has come forward and accused the Coach of supplying them with the test. Overly dramatic music plays, and the light on Principal Smooth is cut by the window blinds. WB noir? Coach denies this, and asks which boy told that dirty lie. Then he asks whether Smooth already tried to get the coach suspended with the school board. "You have a lot of friends in high places," Smooth says quietly. I love Principal Smooth. "I coached most of them. I'm an institution," Wonder Coach says. I'm annoyed with him already. More about the twenty-five years. Smooth says that he's going to try to get the other players to come forward. Coach gets mad at that. He gets up, slams his hand on the desk, and, WHOOSH! The TV set is on fire! Coach looks scared. "What the hell is going on here, Coach?" Principal Smooth says. Smooth takes his briefcase and walks out, right past a fire extinguisher. He just left the room, with the fire still going. He is the worst principal ever. I take back my liking him.
Outside, Principal Smooth has left the building, as if nothing just happened. There's a fire, man! Good God! He's no Principal Skinner, I'll tell you that. He walks to his car. Suddenly it's night outside. Coach watches Principal Smooth through the window as the fire still rages behind him. "Who the hell does he think he is?" Coach asks. Notice all the "hell"s in the dialogue? Totally intentional. Principal Smooth gets into his car, and tries to turn the ignition. Coach is shown closing his eyes, concentrating. Oh no! It's Drew Barrycoach! Principal's car catches fire. He tries to get out, but the door won't open. His suitcase catches fire. Oh no! Not the suitcase! Coach leaves the window, satisfied with his pyrotechnics.