Smallville

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Tippi Blevins: C+ | Grade It Now!
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Raiders of the Lost Heart

Sometime after Tess has finished enjoying her belly laugh, she's on the phone with Oliver. "You're telling me Lois Lane has turned into Isis," she says, more than a hint of disdain in her voice. "How the hell does that even happen?" We can forgive her for being surprised, as she's never seen this show and its many, many contrived ways for getting Lois into sexy costumes. He explains about the amulet and hangs up just as Tess walks through his office doors. Tess highlights how silly this all sounds: "Lois finds a necklace, gets possessed by an Egyptian goddess, and now is flying around like Amelia Earhart minus the plane." Oliver calls it "just another Friday night in Metropolis" and starts showing her to the door through which she just entered moments earlier. He says he and Clark will take care of things. "You don't have to throw me out, Oliver, I'm just trying to protect Clark." Clark whooshes in just in time to hear the last. They catch him up on the Cat thing. Tess tells them she erased the security footage from the loading docks so that Cat can't prove her story. Clark thanks her. He tells them about their new problem: "Lois found Osiris's heart and now I can't find her." Ever notice how much of this show is characters filling each other in on stuff we just saw? It's because of all those two-person scenes! Anyone not in the scene then has to be caught up on the situation.

Oliver: "Well, she does still have one more layover before our nonstop to hell; she has to reunite the heart--" "--with the body to make Osiris whole," Tess finishes for him. Oliver sighs and rolls his eyes. He'll settle for telling Clark about a sarcophagus at the exhibit that might hold Osiris's remains, except Tess beats him to the punch again. "You stole my thunder there, Tess," he says. They exposit that Isis will figure out where to go next from the name stamped on all the crates at the loading docks. Couldn't we have just assumed she'd use magic? Oliver reminds them they have no way of getting Isis back into her amulet. Tess thinks she might know and helps herself to Oliver's laptop. He ixnays that idea, because he thinks Tess is just trying to horn in on their team. He lectures her about keeping secrets. Instead of telling him to go stuff himself, she calmly explains that Lex had records of all his archaeological digs. Even though they were deleted, she can try to get the files back. Clark asks her to hurry, then heads for the door. "Where are you going?" Oliver asks. "To try and prevent the end of the world," Clark answers. Duh.

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Smallville

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