Episode Report Card
Omar G: B | Grade It Now!
Shake It Up

Some time later, Clark is picking up cups and bowls, which is so amazingly pointless before a party's over. "Pretty cool party!" we hear in a girlish, uninflected voice. Must be Lana. And it is. She's wearing a strange top that is stitched like a sailor's uniform. Clark plays it off like he's just blowing off steam and the whole thing was unplanned. Lana says she'd be freaking out. We hear another dish break somewhere in the background. They're called Dixie cups and paper plates, Clark. Bullet-Time to the store for some of those next time. Lana says she wouldn't be brave enough to throw such a party. Yeah, this is the same girl who kept bitching about Nasty Nell taking control of her birthday. Clark says Lana's probably braver than she thinks. Then he asks, almost under his breath, if she's "flying solo" tonight. Lana clarifies the question by repeating it in English. Clark sheepishly smiles and lowers his head. Lana says she's capable of enjoying herself without Jocko Whitney. Just then something from outside flashes and it sounds like...FIREWORKS! I love fireworks! Yay fireworks! "You're full of surprises tonight, Clark," Lana says. "Tell me about it," Clark responds for absolutely no reason.

Outside the house, everybody is rushing to see the 'works. "Clark-Man, how cool is this?" Pete jives. Clark complains that the cops are going to be alerted to the party. Pete says he didn't bring the fireworks. "I did," we hear, and it's Sexy Lexy. "It's a party gift. Hope you like it," Lex says. He also mentions that Clark shouldn't worry about the police: That's covered. As the fireworks continue to burst (love, love, LOVE!), Lex says that a party can make or break a reputation, and he wanted to make sure Clark's was a success. Lana watches from the porch. Lex out of nowhere mentions that Chloe and her class are taking a tour of his fertilizer plant the next day. "It's a class field trip," she exposits. Lex asks what they did wrong to deserve that. Ha, office humor. Just then, a slinky Asian woman wearing even more eye makeup than Lana sidles up to Lex and says, "Sorry I took so long. Someone overflowed the bathroom." So Ho is wearing a strapless dress and looking quite the professional escort. And studly Lex took her to a high-school party. What, was Denny's booked up? "I'm officially dead," Clark mutters, at the toilet remark.

Inside the house, the phone is ringing. Nobody hears it over the fireworks and the music.

MamaKent puts down the phone at a fancy high-rise restaurant in Metropolis. She's wearing a little black number. As she goes back to the table, she worriedly says that Clark isn't answering. "Oh, he's fine, fine," Bo Duke says, obviously trying to dismiss it and get laid for once in his marriage. They get on to their conversation. Bo Duke asks if she misses Metropolis. "Sometimes," she says, her lips pursed to the point where the wind current in Metropolis has just shifted. She says she didn't move to Smallville for action (ahem) and glamour and that she knew she wouldn't be rich. But a certain man (wait, Bo Duke?) told her he couldn't give her the world, but that he'd always love her. Awww. Bo Duke smiles. They kiss. Chastely.

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