Smallville
Justice

Episode Report Card
Omar G: B+ | Grade It Now!
YOU GRADE IT
Just Ass

Back at the chamber of perpetual flashing, the action slows down so we can see that Li'l Flash is running, but he looks tired.

Two more guards are walking by, this time inside the facility. One of them says, "Hey, did you hear about those two guards that look just like us and got cancer from some green mist they inhaled?" "Yeah, that's a damn shame. We had a poker game every Tuesday night with those guys and -- UNGH!" That's when Oliver kicks one of the guys and smashes the other in the neck with a chop. Then he kicks the first guy and throws the second one. They seemed like nice guys, too. Oliver punches the second guy in the face for good measure. Chloe asks Oliver's status. "Switching to silent running," he replies. "Stand by for instructions." All...right, then. I'll just sit here and...uh...watch the blueprints rotate around. Have fun with your...silent...running thing. Jackass. "Aquaman, do your thing!" Oliver calls out. Well, that running silent thing didn't last very long.

Aquadude is lurking in a very well-lit air shaft. He hovers near the grate, which is in clear view of Li'l Flash's chamber of doom.

Hallway. BB is running very fast. He runs right into a third set of two guards and hits them like a linebacker, creating two big energy fields and sending the guys flying. They were from that poker game, too! He keeps running.

Clark is still on the ground, gurgling from the Kryptonite. How's that solo career coming along, Clark? A big guard comes in and points a gun at Clark, saying, "Hey, you're not supposed to be here!" Then he gets shot with an arrow right in the back of the neck. Ouchie! The guard falls. "Neither am I," says Green Arrow. Lame!

We next see Oliver/Green Arrow carrying Clark out of the room. Clark recovers quickly. Oliver calls Chloe and says that the "Boy Scout" is out of the woods. Chloe is relieved. "'Boy Scout'?" asks Clark. Oliver says that Clark could have chosen his own code name ("Flannel Weasel"? "Flaccidman"? "Prairie Dog"?) if he hadn't gone off "all half-cocked." Yes, Clark, next time use your whole cock. (Oliver insists.) Oliver says that if Clark doesn't want to play for "the team," that's all right, but he should be smart about it. This is so gay that John Waters refuses to make a movie about it because it's way too campy. "Point taken!" says Clark bitterly. You see! It's a gay, gay, gay, gay, gay, gay world. Clark's just a squirrel lover looking for some nuts. Clark asks about Li'l Flash. "'Impulse,'" Oliver corrects him. "He didn't get to pick his own code name either." Impulse? I guess that's fairly cool. If a man you've never met before suddenly gives you flowers.... Oliver turns and hands Clark a tiny plastic device. It's the world's thinnest butt plug, tight-ass. Oliver says that "Watchtower" will guide Clark to where Li'l Flash...er, Impulse is being held. Clark asks what Oliver's going to be doing. He turns dramatically amid the indoor mist, turns on his voice-warping device, and says he'll be doing "what I do best." Pretending to like Lois while you flash your teeth for the camera? Oliver scampers off, gay-jogging. Clark can't help watching that ass. It's the Gayest Look of the Episode (among many). In the earpiece, Chloe says, "Watchtower to Boy Scout: Let's find Impulse." Aw, geez. Too many code names, people.

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Smallville

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