We cut to glimpses of the Lana Factory (this, this my friends, is Al and Miles's greatest triumph; the show itself is just gravy) where a Lana Real Doll lies on a slab. Great, how are we supposed to tell these two apart? One is a lifeless but lifelike approximation of Lana Lang; the other is a clone. We see the real Lana zippering up the body bag with the Lana Real Doll. Lex says that this is why Lana was able to wheel the clone out of the lab and place her in the driver's seat. Ugly, grainy footage of these flashbacks. We see Real Lana buckling in the Real Doll into the SUV's driver's seat. We see the car explode. Lana is pulled into the mail truck and drives away as her DNA evidence is safely burnt up in the SUV. "It was perfect," Lex says. It was bullshit. Would it be tacky of me to ask which of the show producers got to keep the Lana doll? Lex says that as far as the world is concerned, the real Lana Luthor is dead and buried. Lana reminds him that a dead woman can't be convicted of murder. She tells him he'll never hurt another person. "I don't want to," Lex says. He comes closer to Lana, even as she warns him to stay away. He pulls the gun closer to his chest. He says that after all the pain he put her through, he deserves to die. What do you think about this, Samuel L. Jackson? "Yes, Lex deserves to die, and I hope he burns in Hell!"
Teary-eyed, Lex tells Lana to please pull the trigger. Fucking weak, man. Come on, Lex! Stop this right now! You poor, pathetic sap! You're supposed to be the evil glue that holds this show together! You're not even, like, a pastel-colored elementary school glue stick! Pull it together, dude! Lex puts his hand over Lana's trembling one. He promises her the world will be a better place if she kills him. She can't, of course. "Kill me," Lex whispers. Her finger twitches. Dramatic music rises. Lex looks disappointed. He takes the gun. This scene was just pathetic. For all of us. Poor us. Lex tells Lana that if she wants to come back to Smallville (Nooooooo!), she'll be safe and can do whatever she wants. He tells her that Papa Luthor is missing, presumed dead, probably on Broadway. He tells Lana he'll never, ever hurt her again. Because he sucks. "I'm sorry, Lana," he says. He walks out slowly as Lana cries. He puts the gun down on his way out. He's not really Lex Luthor so much anymore, huh? Thank God it's over.