Smallville

Episode Report Card
Tippi Blevins: B- | 1318 USERS: B-
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Lazarus

Sometime later, he zips back to his old loft and starts to take the new suit out of its box. Before he can put it on, though, an octagonal shape begins to glow beneath the cover of a nearby book. (It's The Adventures of Tom Sawyer, for those keeping score at home.) The glow zaps both him and the suit to the Fortress of Solitude. Clark stands there, still in his regular Emo Blur getup, and calls out, "I defeated Lex!" He gets no reply, so he goes on, raising his voice: "I refused to let him win!" Clark says he pushed himself harder than he ever has before, which doesn't seem quite right. He smiles and says he thought he was flying. "I saved everyone," he says. "I don't know how, but I saved them all!" Dude, you ran really fast, and Bad Lex was too busy dying to come up with a better plan. It's not that big a deal. But Clark thinks it means he's finally the hero that Jor-El meant for him to be. Jor-El finally speaks: "Pride... vanity... You almost took a man's life, and you dare tell me you're following the path I set out for you?" Well... yeah? The real Jor-El seemed pretty peace-loving, but the AI Jor-El is sort of a hawkish, contradictory dick. Clark's pissed because Jor-El sent him back to fight evil, and that's what he did. The Fortress rumbles. "The EEE-VILL is you, Kal-El," says Jor-El. He goes on about how some new darkness is coming and how it will prey on "wavering souls" like Clark's. "Once this darkness consumes you, you will be Earth's greatest enemy." Clark is disturbed. "You cannot be a beacon of hope with darkness in your heart," Jor-El says, because "darkness" is the word of the day. Clark and his extremely white teeth demand to know why Jor-El sent him back if that's the case. Jor-El says it wasn't his decision. Instead of asking just whose decision it was, Clark pouts about how the rest of the world sees him as a hero, even if his space papa doesn't. Jor-El is disappointed now because he thinks Clark will never be Earth's savior. He's so disappointed, in fact, that he turns off all the lights and gives Clark the silent treatment.

We rejoin Oliver in his dank torture chamber. There's a very long, very slow pan up the side of his naked, bloody torso. Normally, I'd be happy for the guided tour of Mount Nipple, but this is sort of gross. He's still blindfolded. His head slumps forward. His creepy interrogator slaps his face a bit, waking him. A rivulet of blood drips from Oliver's mouth. "It's your lucky day, Shamrock," says Creepy. "I'm letting you go." "Aw, I was kind of hoping for a goodbye kiss from you," Oliver cracks. Then he grows serious. "We're not done," he says. "I will hunt you, and I will find you. You understand?" Creepy's not frightened, seeing as how Oliver doesn't even know who he is. He takes off Oliver's blindfold then punches him out before he can see anything. Why is he trying so hard to conceal his identity now when he showed his face on that recorded message earlier? Who knows?

Smallville

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