Episode Report Card
Omar G: A | 1 USERS: B+
Flower Power

Chloe walks up suddenly and asks them both what their deepest desire is. It's a poll she's conducting to get closer in touch with the pulse of the student body. I think the student body needs angioplasty. Pete says he'd like a make-out session with a girl who's walking by now. It's a girl who looks a little like the lead singer from Elastica, but prettier. She walks by and gives Pete a glance. He heads over to get his Petey Mack on. Chloe complains that all her answers have been sex- or violence-related. "That's human nature, Chloe," Pete says before he goes. Clark asks Chloe if she knows that Pete doesn't like Lex. Chloe knows and says that Pete is jealous of their friendship. Again: fifteen episodes. Time has not been kind to this revelation. Lana walks up and sucks the energy, air, and hydrogen molecules from the scene in her little pansy pink top. She gets asked the desire question. She says she'd want to climb to the top of a windmill where you can see Metropolis in the distance. Chloe and Clark are surprised about her deepest desire. Clark wishes it were leather. Lana, embarrassed, says she can make something up. Chloe goes with it, saying it's nice to unleash the inner Lana. Yeah, get through a few geological layers of makeup and maybe you'll find her. Chloe gives Lana big pity eyes. Lana walks off. Chloe says Clark's desire is up. He stares after Lana, and it's all obvious. Chloe's hair is really frizzy at the ends this week. Get those split ends taken care of, dear. Clark bitches about having to stay away from Lana because of the whole Jocko-Whitney-Dad thing. Chloe says that there are other girls who don't require crossing an emotional minefield to be with. She might as well be wearing a big sign that says, "Take me for a test drive!" Clark says he can't turn off his feelings for Lana. Chloe tells him, snippily, that he can stay in his loft and play with his telescope or move on. Telescope! Ha! Chloe is a damn genius. The phallic joke is king! Chloe walks off. Clark looks on after her, conflicted.

Bo the Slob piles down the stairs, whistling. He comes up behind a smiling MamaKent and asks if she'd like to go up to the hayloft for a little fun. Then he starts groping her ass. You know, Bo (the actor, not the character) looks like he's having a little too much fun here. MamaKent declines and says that she has to go get some work done. Those platitudes aren't going to raise themselves. She suggests that Bo call Lex and apologize. He gets mad and says he was only telling Lex the truth about his feelings. He smiles. MamaKent says he's taking this honesty thing too far. Bo says he feels free. He takes MamaKent's hand and kisses it. She feels his head and says he's burning up with fever. She moves to leave, and says she'll make soup when she returns. "I know a much better way to break a fever," Gropey Bo says while pawing her again. She escapes his clutches and looks back after him, all scared. Bo slams the screen door and scoffs. As Bo is stewing, the phone behind him rings. The answering machine picks up with a cheery "this is the Kents, leave a message!" No alien boy living here! It's Jim Alexander on the phone (but is he a FABulous Alexander?) from the bank. Jim says, "I'm gonna be straight with you." Well that'll be a first on this show. He tells Bo, via the machine, that they're going to turn down Bo's loan. Bo angrily picks up the phone. He tells poor Jim that all he's ever done is give to the community, and all he's ever gotten is screwed over. Jim probably wants to keep it very straight right about now. Bo says he's going to come down to the bank so that Jim can turn him down to his face: "That way I can see if you still have a pair, or whether your wife keeps them in a drawer, too!" What the hell does that mean? Jim! Keep it straight when Bo comes down to look at your pair! Bo takes the phone and whacks it against the wall, breaking it apart. Then he looks very satisfied and nods to himself, as if in agreement.

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