Chloe is in her newspaper office. She exposits the story in case we missed the pool mack-down. She can't believe it. Clark is toweling off. He's got detention. Clark says it was everything he'd wanted to hear, but didn't seem right. Chloe asks why he thinks Lana went "soft-core." Heh. Chloe and Clark try to Scooby out a solution to the town's weirdness based on the truck accident site. Chloe suddenly notices that in one of her digital photos, Dr. Hamilton was hiding in the bushes. Blessedly, he's not trying to please himself. Chloe says she's going to go talk to him. And so she will.
The newly renovated Talon coffee house and schmooze palace. A sign outside reads, "Now Open. Poetry readings Thursdays." Yikes. Lex is on a cell phone. He says that he was just at the hospital and that things are getting worse. Lana strides in purposefully. Obligatory "Lana is freaking out" scene. Lana blows off work (get it? She's usually so responsible!), whistles, and declares that she's closing for the afternoon and that everyone's coffee is on the house. Lex looks up curiously and finishes his cell call. She rubs whipped cream on her fingers and licks it seductively. Can I get you some strawberries to go with that, Kim Basinger? Lex goes to her, leaving his keys on his chair. Is that a whistle on his keychain? Lex tells Lana, who spins around on her stool (and is wearing a tight red, off-the-shoulder-dress -- again, thanks Nell), that she's not impressing anyone with her attitude and that he practically invented adolescent rebellion with a bra, two matchsticks, and a paper clip. Lana smiles, leaning in, and says she heard Lex was a bad boy before he came to town. Lex seems embarrassed. Lana says that Lex only invested in The Talon because she asked him to. She takes her whipped cream and puts some on Lex's upper and lower lip. Yowza. I think all the forum dwellers just fainted. "Was it really about profit?" she asks. Lex licks his lower lip and looks down. She puts her hand on his stomach through his shirt. He takes her hand away and asks if she's feeling all right. Lana goes around Lex and plays with his ear as she says she needs guidance from someone with experience. Is everybody there watching this? "What do you say, boss?" she asks. It's nice being the boss of someone. Lex has a lightbulb moment and suddenly spins on her. He asks where she's been in the last twenty-four hours. She says it's none of his business. Lana gets mad. She asks why he thinks this isn't her. Because she's not doing exactly as she's told? She starts pushing Lex like Elaine on Seinfeld yelling "GET! OUT!" She rants some more and concludes by acknowledging that she's always talking about her dead parents. Lana's parents died? When did this happen? How did I miss that? She throws a cup at Lex (he ducks) and it shatters against the nicely painted wall. She grabs Lex's keys and runs out.