Episode Report Card
admin: C | 1 USERS: A+
Red Dawn

After the commercials, we find ourselves at Belle Reve Sanitarium, as an ominous-looking sign on a chain link fence tells us. If you weren't already crazy before you went in there, you'd be crazy when you came out. Inside, in the exam room where Lois is being held, Stuart is inserting a pair of glowing green sensors into Tess's temples. The metal prongs going into her skull are like an inch long, which seems... ill-advised. Stuart agrees with me: "Tuning the TV to channel Lois is one thing, but synching your brainwaves to hers?" Tess thinks it's necessary to see more than jumbled images. Stuart wants to at least call in someone from Summerholt to help, but Tess pays him no mind. Zod said the solar tower would change the world and Tess thinks Lois's visions will show her how. Stuart, whose name must mean "easily persuaded" in Scottish, taps a few keys at the computer and links Tess and Lois's brains together.

Immediately, we're taken to another flashback. This time it's of the Kent farm underneath that gigantimous red sun. The grass is still as green and pretty as can be, by the way. Inside the barn, Lois wakes up on the floor next to a rat. To her credit, she doesn't freak out and the rat moseys along. The barn has been converted into a prison camp. Kandorian soldiers keep watch over a couple dozen or so people who huddle together next to hay bales. Barbed wire crisscrosses the windows. A skittish woman gathers up two young children to go get whatever meager food the soldiers are giving out. That sort of four-diamond symbol that was on the orb is on a red flag that hangs from the loft railing. Alia walks through the crowd, holding one of the male prisoners by the throat. "Stealing will not go unpunished!" she says in what I suspect is supposed to be a stern tone, but sounds horribly wooden. She tosses this poor sap to the ground and uses her heat vision to burn a Z onto his back. His skin sizzles like bacon. Alia sees that Lois has been watching this display and approaches her. Lois backs up, claiming she was just looking for food. Alia demands a trade. Just then, Clark walks up between them, proffering Jonathan Kent's watch. He's handsomely scruffy and his skin has never looked dewier. I'd say life as human cattle is agreeing with him. Lois is surprised to see him. Alia takes the watch and leaves them alone. Clark hugs Lois and whispers, "I thought I'd lost you forever." She still thinks she's dreaming, but Clark breaks the news to her that it's real. "Since when the Kent farm become a prison and why would you give away the one thing of your dad's that meant so much to you?" Girl, he did it to get you some food. You were right there when that transaction went down. "I did it for you," he says quietly. I guess absence really does make the heart grow fonder, because I don't think he was quite this taken with her last May, which would have been the last time he saw her. Lois steers the conversation back around to the "Wicked Witch" and the "flying freaks." Huh. Second week in a row for a Wizard of Oz reference. Think it means anything? Clark tells her they've been invaded by aliens. This connects the dots for Lois, who remembers Tess spouting off about an alien orb before their fight. "Tess knew about this," Lois says, her tone accusatory. Clark tells her he tried to fight the aliens' leader, Zod. "But I made all the wrong choices and people died." Lois begs him to tell her Chloe wasn't one of them, but Clark says he doesn't know, because the big dipwad left everyone behind after he thought he'd lost Lois. He hasn't heard from her in months. This makes Lois realize she's not in the present anymore. Er, the past. Whatever. Clark figures out she has the Legion ring and tells her to guard it when the Kandorian soldier from earlier shows up to take her to Zod. Clark stupidly throws a punch at the super-powered alien soldier, which turns out to be about as effective as a mouse fart against a lion. The soldier tosses him thirty feet into a makeshift table where all the prisoners' food was. I bet the prisoners are gonna be piiiisssed. The soldier drags Lois away.

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