Smallville
Smallville

Episode Report Card
Omar G: B+ | 524 USERS: C+
YOU GRADE IT
Perry White Is All Right

Torch office. The Wall of Weird. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, I know. Chloe didn't really take down the Wall last week, it was part of a dream. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, you can stop emailing me now. Please forgive me. As penance, I forced myself to watch Lana/Clark kissing scenes from episodes past until my hands turned into twisted claws and my heart shrank three sizes. I'm a shadow of a man now. ["'Now'? (Just kidding.)" -- Wing Chun] Clark, standing by the wall with his new friend, tells Perry they should go. "I thought our stuff was off the wall," Perry says in wonder. No, it's on the wall. On this wall. Wall, wall, wall. I'm sick of hearing about the Wall of Weird, you hear me!? (Deep breaths.) Perry says it's incredible. "It's also all true," Chloe says, appearing suddenly in a bright red top and a belt the size of an actual belt sander. Clark tells her that "Mr. White" is interested in the meteor shower and wanted a look at her stuff. Chloe is cool with that. Perry says that he's already borrowed two or three of Chloe's ideas for his show. He asks if she makes it all up herself, or if she brings in other writers. Chloe does a little eye-roll take. "Excuse me?" she asks. It's completely out of the realm of possibility to Chloe that an outsider might think her creepy stories of firestarters and monster fat suckers might not be accepted as truth. Perry presents his card and says it's not every day he meets another "junk journalist with a penchant for the bizarre." I love this character. Can we keep him? Please, please, can we? Huh? Please? Chloe looks at the card, but her thumb is covering the first name. "'X Styles'?" she asks. Perry sort of chuckles and nods. Chloe says she has a penchant for the truth, which Perry's "freaks and shrieks" show gave up around Episode Two. Ah yes, "Episode II: The Fandom Menace," in which hardcore fans of Star Wars were revealed to have had actual sex with actual humans. Nobody bought it for a second. "That's it, we're done," Clark says as he leads Perry away. Perry is giggling. Clark is completely ineffectual in these last two scenes. You'd think he'd let out a little of that red Kryptonite anger. I think Clark has a little crush on Perry, too. Chloe moves her thumb and reveals, "Perry White, journalist." She tells Perry to wait, and asks if he's The Perry White. Perry's smile fades. He licks his lips and says he's going to go back to the hotel; he advises the "young lovers" to patch things up. He makes a quick, dodgy exit. Chloe asks Clark is he has any idea who that was. Clark barely knows whether he's wearing shoes right now.

Smallville

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