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Perry White Is All Right

Torch. Perry walks in slowly. Chloe -- without turning from her computer monitor -- tells him it's a wise decision, coming inside: "Weather service expects a light shower of threshing machines, followed by a drizzle of combines." Perry is amused. He wanders over to the Wall of Weird (yes, I know, the one that never got taken down) as Chloe offers to help him find whatever it is he's looking for. He asks why. She says that Perry was once the kind of reporter she'd like to be. She's curious as to how one goes from multiple Pulitzer nominee to chasing Bigfoot. Perry says that the only thing worse than not ever getting a big story is getting it and being afraid to write it. Chloe's incredulous that Perry "The Pit Bull" White was ever afraid of anything. Chloe is wearing that fabulous new scent from London, "Naïveté." Perry says that Papa Luthor can be very persuasive. Chloe probes. Perry says that not everybody appreciates good investigative journalism. Especially when it "treads on the toes of the rich and vengeful." Perry notices a newspaper story from when Clark burned a symbol on the Kent barn. Chloe tells Perry the police chalked it up to frat boys trying to crop circles on the barn. "Why?" Chloe asks. Perry says that Clark intrigues him. Hmm, hard-drinking stranger from out of town intrigued by handsome farmboy. It's not like it doesn't happen every day. Chloe looks at the newspaper story, and then back at Perry. She seems confused, or scared, or both.

Kent Farm. Where the brand burns upon the ass. Bo is looking at some of Clark's solar-flare research, yet pooh-poohing the idea that they have anything to do with Clark's tractor pass. Clark says that his powers started to glitch when the solar disturbance started. Bo has no reason whatsoever to be skeptical, yet he is, so that Pete can come in and tell them that the "cosmic fender-bender" produced the largest recorded solar flare. And just in time for the real solar flares that have been in the news lately! Gotta love that timing. That reminds me of when that movie The Core was coming out how the PR people were so desperate to get the movie attention that they were emailing movie critics about how scientifically accurate the movie is by trying to pass it off as something that could really happen. Yeah, Core this. Pete shows off a newspaper with some news about the solar flares, and the power failures and surges that have been happening as a result. Clark says that's what's going on with him. Oh, but we love the surges, don't we? Clark is solar bipolar. Bo mutters that they've always wondered about the source of Clark's power. They just assumed it was raw gay energy. Clark wonders now if it's not the sun. Pete calls Clark a walking solar battery. All the hot boys hope Clark is at least a C-cell. Bo says that the flares should stop by tomorrow night; he thinks maybe Clark's glitching will stop by then. Doesn’t the time it takes for the flare energy to reach the Earth count for anything? Would it be that fast? Obviously, I did not major in any kind of science, natural or otherwise. Clark says that he'll try not to use his powers until then. Chloe comes in to give Clark a heads-up about their "resident Ghostbuster." "Perry White?" Clark asks. No, Harold Ramis. Chloe says that Perry had a change of heart about going to Metropolis: "And he seems to be especially interested in you, Clark." "That's it," Bo thinks. "No more offering free handjobs from the boy to grain feed salesmen and tractor repairmen."

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