"Wedding Day. 1:35 pm." Lana is in her chair by the fire, writing her little note. She's trying really hard to be emotionally conflicted. Clark appears at the door. Again. We repeat the bit about him revealing his big secret and Lana telling him he doesn't have to. It's much lamer the second time around. I decide against trying the Queen of Denial joke again. Lana wants to meet Clark at the barn. She kisses him. He leaves. This time, we see the person coming in through the other door. It's Papa Luthor: "Miss Lang!" He suavely checks his watch and asks if she shouldn't be on her way to the church right now. Naw, dude, that's at 3:30. He sees a note on the end table. "What's this?" he asks. He reaches for it. Lana tries to be slick and get it before he does, but the Bastard is Fast as well as Magnificent. He gives Lana a hilarious stink-eye and scoffs. Then reads the note. In huge, child-like cursive letters, it reads, "Dear Lex, Iâm so sorry but I can't go through with this." Papa's mood darkens. "This will destroy Lex," he says. Yeah, it will. And Lana's handwriting coach. Lana says she's sorry, but that it's none of Papa's business. Papa says that he's making it his business. He says he can't let Lana call off the wedding. This is what I don't get: why doesn't Lana call off the wedding then, and not leave Lex at the altar waiting? That's just cruel and unnecessary. She could have easily had Chloe tell Lex and the priest not to wait. Papa Luthor folds the note in half. This shit's gonna get a pretty penny on eBay. Lana says that things have changed, and that it wouldn't be fair to pretend that things haven't. Papa thinks for just a moment before saying, "You know Clark's secret, don't you?" Lana doesn't have the poker face to deny it. Papa says that he's been watching Lana since she started seeing Lex. He circles her as he says she's been getting closer and closer to the "shocking" truth about Clark. He mocks her for not figuring it out when it was happening right under her nose. Lana turns and says that Clark was trying to protect her. Papa Luthor chuckles. Fiercely, Lana says that Clark isn't going to let Papa threaten him now. Papa goes bad-ass: he tells Lana that Clark's not invincible. He says that, like every hero, Clark has an Achilles's Heel, and that Papa knows what it is. And: "I know that it could kill him." "No," says Lana, "you could never hurt him." "Would you bet...Clark's life on that?" he asks. Papa Luthor makes a promise, and it's bone-chilling: "If you don't honor the promise that you've made to my son, or I find out you told anyone about this conversation, I will KILL. Clark Kent." Holy moly! Lana is completely destroyed. At least something good came out of this episode. Dark music accompanies Papa Luthor making a grand exit. Lana sniffles as the music crescendos. Don't you even think about killing him off, Smallville. Or I will KILL. A sentence in a recap. In effigy. Don't make me do it!
Episode Report CardOmar G: C- | 1045 USERS: B-
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