Smallville

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Tippi Blevins: D | Grade It Now!
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Freaky Friday

They zip off to the Fortress of Solitude. Clark explains that Kara told him that "the head of the house has to approve all life unions." Lois teases him about just how "romantic" that sounds. "Kal-El, my son," intones the voice of Jor-El. "You have returned." Thanks, Mr. Obvious. Clark takes a few steps away from Lois. "Jor-El, I come here today as a Kryptonian, as a member of your house and your son. In honor of our home, I'm here to declare my desire to start a life bond with this woman, Lois Lane." Jor-El asks Lois if this is all kosher with her. When she answers in the affirmative, Jor-El starts things rumbling in the Fortress. He says, "You must both understand." Lights flash. The whole place shakes. A big pillar of ice breaks free and lands on Lois. It turns out ice is shitty building material for fortresses. Clark jogs over and tries unsuccessfully to raise the pillar. He begs Jor-El to return his powers but Jor-El is characteristically inscrutable. Clark grunts and shoves and grunts some more. Suddenly, the pillar shifts. Clark jumps back. Lois raises the pillar high overhead. "Lois, are you OK?" Clark asks. "I'm more than OK," she says. "I'm super!" Somebody save Clark from the hernia he probably just gave himself!

Instead of seeing Lois give Clark a speedy piggyback ride back to Metropolis, we move next to Oliver's "Celtic coast" destination. Oliver rappels down through a cave and touches down in something that looks like an underground temple. Massive stone columns bear alien runes. "I'm starting to regret not packing my intergalactic dictionary about now," Oliver says. He makes quips even when he doesn't think anyone can hear him. But it turns out someone can hear him this time. A voice behind him says that the symbols are "Apokoliptian." Oliver whips out his bow, ready to shoot until he realizes it's Kara. She's striking a pose in a circle of light. He moves toward her but she stops him. "It'll kill you," she says, indicating the light surrounding her. To demonstrate, she tosses a small rock that disintegrates when it hits the light. She thinks Oliver has been sent by Watchtower to rescue her, but it turns out nobody even noticed she was missing for most of the season. They realize they're both there to find the Bow of Orion. Kara's kind of down on Oliver for searching for it without Clark, but he points out she's doing the same thing. She says she's doing it to protect Clark. "Who are you here to save?" she asks. Instead of answering, he gets busy trying to free her. Kara deciphers the runes for him, telling him it's a prophecy about Darkseid. She touched Orion's symbol on one of the columns and ended up trapped. The symbols say that "a balance must exist between light and darkness, and to wield the bow's power and save the world, hands must first right the scales' two sides." Oliver mulls this over and figures that since Kara touched the Orion symbol, he now has to touch the Omega symbol on an opposite column. "Or we could be stuck down here for centuries," he says. No, Kara will be stuck there for centuries. You'll die in a week or so. Kara decides that since Clark trusts Oliver, she does, as well. Oliver lays hands on the Omega and the light surrounding Kara blinks off. They head off to find the bow.

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Smallville

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