Smallville

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Tippi Blevins: C+ | Grade It Now!
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Resident Weasel

LuthorCorp building. Inside, Oliver is pleasantly shirtless. A woman wearing only a police uniform top examines Oliver's wallet. "I know I was supposed to give this back to you after I checked your license, but I couldn't help myself." I guess she was the lone cop who was chasing him. Oliver broods and drinks whiskey. Lady cop makes a remark about Oliver's many platinum cards, then finds a picture of Lois. "But I bet this is the most valuable of them all," she says, because yet another bitter love triangle is exactly what this show needs. Oliver looks sad. He pops some pills. She tells him not to "speed" in here. Oliver says he's been awake since Tuesday and the pills are the only thing keeping him vertical. No one makes a joke about getting horizontal. They kiss and kiss. Lady cop starts to undo Oliver's pants but a piece of his belt buckle clatters to the floor. Instead of continuing their prelude to a hump, she picks up the buckle and notices a tiny camera in it. Oliver seems surprised to see the spyware. Lady cop thinks Oliver had plans to put her naughty bits on YouTube. She tells Oliver not to call or E-mail. "Don't worry -- I never do." She slaps him. His torso sure is oily. He doesn't try to stop her leaving. He looks at the buckle again and smiles. "Mercy," he muses out loud.

Meanwhile, at the Watchtower, Chloe is analyzing the blood sample. Emil joins her and she explains that she's found a suspect enzyme, but she can't find a match. She asks Emil if he got anything from the Disease Control Agency. He pulls up a computer model of the outbreak's path that spreads over most of the city. He explains that Dr. Coats thinks the virus induces sleep so that it can "germinate." Emil and Chloe think they would be able to create an antidote if they mimic the enzyme. All they need is a blood match. Emil looks at Chloe's data and realizes he's seen an enzyme like that once before: "In Davis Bloome." Chloe frowns. Have you ever noticed how many scenes in this show end with someone frowning? Let me tell you, it's a lot.

Daily Planet. Clark rips a strip of fabric from his shirt to bandage Lois's wound. They look at each other for a long time before she asks, "Do you think they've quarantined the city?" Clark says they probably have, because they've found out it's an airborne virus. Lois thinks this means they could both be infected. She thinks it would suck to die without any closure. Lady, if you want satisfying closure, you need to get yourself on another show. She asks Clark if he has any "deep, dark secrets." Instead of answering, he asks, "Do you?" She confesses that when she was talking to the Blur, she felt like she was finally doing something that mattered. "I wanted to work with him because we did such good things together, but then I realized I wasn't doing it just to save people. I was doing it for me." Clark gives her a small smile. "I just wanted to be with him," she says, near tears. Clark says having a crush doesn't make her a bad person. Lois gets closer to Clark and says now that she's had this kind of "connection" with someone, she doesn't want to go back to how things were before. She admits she doesn't doesn't want to be alone anymore. So... she's making a play for Clark? Because the Blur hasn't called her in a few days? Or is she just being weirdly snuggly with Clark while she tells him how much she wants to be with the Blur? I don't get the purpose of this scene except to anvil us with the whole "love triangle for two" thing. For the characters within their little universe, it doesn't make a lot of sense. Clark and Lois stare at each other for fifteen hours while sad orchestral music plays.

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Smallville

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