Episode Report Card
Omar G: C+ | Grade It Now!

Front entrance of The Daily Planet. Chloe and Clark are walking down some stairs. Chloe is amazed that Clark told Lana his secret. Chloe struggles with a reaction, then asks, "After all those years of me yanking on your closet door, what's the real reason for the sudden coming-out party?" It's just no fun when they spell it out like that, ya know? Clark says that it was only a matter of weeks before Lana would have broken up with him. They walk by a woman who screams in delight as some flowers are delivered to her desk and she reads the card. Chloe finds a breakup hard to fathom. She says that Clark and Lana are perfect for each other, and that they're the Kansas version of Ken and Barbie. If by that you mean plastic and poseable? Yes. Chloe says that Ken and Barbie actually did break up, which is kind of weird. Just then, some guy in a suit enters the room from a side office and yells, "You can't fire me, I quit!" Wow, could this scene be any more stagy? I have the feeling that all these little side moments are going to come back to haunt us. Chloe asks how Lana took "the whole 'E.T. phone home' thing." Clark says he's not sure, and was hoping she'd have called by now. The phone at Chloe's desk rings. Chloe gives Clark a funny look. It's Lana! "Yes, Chloe, I'll marry you!" No, not really. Chloe tells the caller that it's not Mr. Foo's Noodle House. Chloe doubts that things will change between her and Clark. "One thing might," Clark says. He tells Chloe that he asked Lana to marry him. Chloe doesn't exactly light up the night with her smile. She seems taken aback and a little saddened. But then she does smile. "Well, that one wasn't on the Doppler!" she says. "Not even a blip!" Clark starts rattling off his guesses as to Chloe's reasons they shouldn't get married: they're too young, there's too much at stake.... Chloe stops Clark to say that what she really wants to tell him is that there are very few people who really know what they want and are willing to risk everything for it. She smiles at Clark: "If anyone deserves to be happy, Clark, it's you." If anyone doesn't deserve a friend like Chloe, it's Clark.

Kent house. It's still snowing outside. Clark steps outside wearing a full suit. Lana arrives at the front in her red SUV. Clark says he expected to see her at the party. "I know, but then there'd be all those people," she says. Ew. People. Clark asks Lana if he looks different to her now. You're in a suit with no flannel shirt. What do you think? Lana says that Clark looks like the same handsome guy she's always known. Clark asks if that's "handsome" as in "she wants to spend the rest of her life with him," or "handsome" as in "she's going to let him down easy." Damn, Clark! I thought you were going to give her time to think about it. That was pretty clumsy, dude. Lana says, "As in, 'Yes, Clark. I'll marry you.'" The demons dance as the gates of Hell swing open. Dance, demons, dance! They happily jig out and into our realm, biting babies' heads as they go and shitting on all the flowers. Lana hands Clark the ring. He puts it on her itty bitty finger. The band itself is about the size of mitochondria, yet it's still loose on her finger. The score becomes triumphant, with church bells and all. Lana giggles. Clark lifts her up and swings her around as the camera cranes out of there, past a tree.

Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14Next





Get the most of your experience.
Share the Snark!

See content relevant to you based on what your friends are reading and watching.

Share your activity with your friends to Facebook's News Feed, Timeline and Ticker.

Stay in Control: Delete any item from your activity that you choose not to share.

The Latest Activity On TwOP