Smallville

Episode Report Card
Omar G: F | 1 USERS: F
YOU GRADE IT
Love Is A Many Squandered Thing

Commercials. He's Just Not That Into You. Or this movie.

The Talon. Lana and Clark have fished the dummy back out of the trash and have given it to Chloe, who has somehow acquired the skill to break it apart and connect its circuit board to her laptop. As she messes with the computer, Clark is standing nearby calling Lana and telling her he picked up Chloe from the hospital, who apparently has had no ill effect from being gassed. Why would Toymaker let her live? That seems like a pretty big fucking plothole right there. "This Toy Man Guy got away," Clark tells Lana. Uh... huh. Clark tells Lana to keep looking for the bomb. Clark leaves the voice message in staccato like it's being sent via telegram. Chloe asks Clark if he's not supposed to be hunting for the bomb, too. Cark says the wireless camera may be their only shot at tracking down Lex. Clark says Lana is already searching for at the newspaper. The paper where she has no security access? Sure, trust her to do that. Chloe says the signal was definitely being broadcast to one receiver. She managed to get past Lex's "Gaggle of ghost routers." GHOST ROUTER, CAMERA ANTI-HEEEEERO! She managed to track down a single IP address. Clark asks where Lex is. Chloe says it's more like when; he's been on the move the whole time. Clark thought he was immobilized. Chloe says he may be, but his IP address is, "Still leaping tall wireless towers in a single bound." Oh, the dialogue shame. Chloe says she locked the signal with one of Oliver's satellites and sync'd it with her PDA. She hands it to Clark. Uh... does this thing play Enigmo? Chloe says she made Clark a "Lex Tracker." Where was this thing when Clark was six years younger and way hornier? Clark watches a red dot moving across Metropolis on a city map. Chloe says that the satellite is about to go out of range, so Clark only has to minutes before the signal goes out. Couldn't she have routed it to another of Oliver's satellites? Clark stands there instead of using those 10 minutes.

The Daily Planet. Clark whooshes into the basement, calling for Lana. Lana whooshes in right next to him. I thought Clark was going after Lex. What the Hell? She says she searched every room, but couldn't find anything. "Like you said, we're a team," Clark tells her. So you both couldn't find the bomb. Great. An alarm bell is ringing and the building seems empty. Clark uses his superhearing. The camera spins around him and the lights go hyper-bright. He hears something buzzing and whirring. "It's on the roof," he tells Lana. She didn't bother to check the roof? The roof where she just stood last week? What kind of useless wannabe superhero is Lana? Clark should just tell her to go away right then. Clark zips off.

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Smallville

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Now that Charlie Hunnam has dropped out of the Fifty Shades of Grey movie, who should be cast as Christian Grey?

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