Smallville

Episode Report Card
Omar G: F | 1 USERS: F
YOU GRADE IT
Love Is A Many Squandered Thing

Clark stands on a street alley holding the PDA in his hand. There's a giant trailer parked nearby. The PDA is counting down from 10 seconds. "You'll never hurt anyone else ever again," Clark says flatly. He begins walking to the rig, but Lana zips to appear in front of him. Clark holds his stomach and steps back. Lana says she knows how much it hurts right now, but if Clark proceeds, he will kill Lex. Now she's lecturing Clark on his deepest principle? What the fuck? DO NOT KILL, CLARK. Do we need to get you a tattoo to remind you? Clark says that after what Lex has done to them, he needs to be stopped. So it wasn't all right to kill Lex when he was slaughtering people or planning to blow up half the city, but now that you can't go near your schmoopie, killing is the plan? You suck, Clark. You really, really suck. Stiffly, Lana says, "I promise that I will help you to punish Lex. But if you kill him, you will lose so much more than us being together. Clark. You will lose yourself." That doesn't sound like such a bad thing right now. The truck suddenly blows up. We see a quick flash of Faux Lex's one eye widening and his skin glowing red. Lana is pushed forward by the blast. That's one big explosion. Lana and Clark look surprised. So... no killing then? Agreed.

Commercials. 3G dead zones. Not as tragic as they sound.

At the Isis Foundation, Chloe waits as an inkjet printer spits out a perfect black and white photo of the truck wreck in about half a second. Chloe squints in disbelief as she notices something on one of the big monitors of Lana's Control Center. She uses her Apple Mighty Mouse, the one with the gross nipple, to zoom in. It's a surveillance camera at the hospital. She sees Oliver leaving his room, fully dressed. In his hand, he's holding the explosive monkey toy. Chloe can't believe it. A monkey who plays the cymbals? That's just crazy! Oliver is suddenly standing behind her, back near the doorway. "Lex deserved to die, Chloe," he says. Why doesn't she have a surveillance camera for this office? Chloe, wearing a tight, red satin top, says Oliver certainly made sure Lex got what he deserved. She says the remains were identified at Lex's. There were remains? Oliver shifts his eyes left and right. "What does Clark think?" he asks. Honestly? Not much. Chloe says Clark thinks the Toymaker must have turned on Lex since pieces of the bomb were found in the wreckage. I don't suppose Clark will ever ask Toymaker directly to see if that's true. Oliver thinks about it. "Must kill Toymaker," he adds to his mental to-do list. Oliver looks at a copy of that day's paper. The A1 headline reads, "TOY BOMBER STILL AT LARGE." They used his employee photo. How sad for him. Oliver says that makes sense; the Toymaker was playing a game he couldn't win. Chloe looks disgusted. She can't believe Oliver is going to let another man take the blame for something he did. Yeah, well. Them's the breaks. Oliver rationalizes, saying that Winslow had already killed the LuthorCorp board and was planning to take down The Planet. He says one more death's not gonna make a difference. "Are you listening to yourself?" Chloe asks, "you're really crossed a line here!" Ollie says that Lex is dead. The world and Clark are safer because of it. Chloe says it's murder. Oliver calls it justice. Tomato. To-mah-to. Let's call the whole thing off. No, seriously. Can we call the whole thing off before there's a Season Nine? Oliver doesn't think Clark will be able to accept the justice angle. Oliver tells Chloe she knows what he did was right. He also tells her not to stand there looking so innocent. Take it off! Oliver circles around Chloe. He says he did some video viewing of his own. He found footage of Chloe killing a meteor freak herself named Sebastian Kane. Chloe shakes her head. She's near tears. She says it was Brainiac, not her. "Whatever," Oliver says. He tells her it was a natural instinct to protect Clark. He says that now that Lex is gone, she ought to be relieved. Chloe is almost crying. She says every fiber of her conscience wants to say it's not true. "But..." Ollie says she can't tell Clark. "Lex just ripped the man's heart out," he says. Oliver says Clark will need his friends around him, nor more than ever. He walks out as Chloe stands there, conflicted.

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Smallville

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Now that Charlie Hunnam has dropped out of the Fifty Shades of Grey movie, who should be cast as Christian Grey?

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