Smallville

Episode Report Card
Omar G: F | 1 USERS: F
YOU GRADE IT
Love Is A Many Squandered Thing

Oliver's hospital room. He's lying asleep with his arms laid out. He wakes up and realizes that his hands are bound to the bed by red handcuffs. Toymaker is standing there, messing with a tool and a clapping monkey toy. "The Hell?" Oliver asks. Without looking at Oliver, Toymaker says he wanted him to feel what it was like not to be in control for once. Oliver wants to be untied. He moves his pectoral muscles around to attract a mate. Toymaker puts down the monkey toy and says that wouldn't be much fun. Oliver sees the inside of the guy's coat pocket; he's wearing a pocket protector with miniature versions of his tools, including a small hammer and a bite-sized magnifying glass. Oliver sees the balloons and figures things out. But he plays it cool. He says he gets it, but the children's ward is two floors up. "Excuse me?" Toymaker asks. Oliver says that the balloons, the monkey, the ridiculous outfit the guy's wearing... it's obvious he's a clown. "Aren't you a clown?" Oliver asks, smiling. Homeboy is pissed. "I am Winslow Schott!" he says emphatically. Oliver squints, pretending not to remember. Toymaker points a gloved hand at Ollie and says he was once called one of the greatest minds at S.T.A.R. Labs. Then, he was fired. Oliver nods slowly, pretending to remember. Oliver chuckles, saying it's good to see the guy still plays with toys. "Come on, man," he laughs, "how much for the ape?" Toymaker, annoyed, sneers and leans in. He says he doesn't need Oliver's money anymore. He found someone new to work with, a person who appreciates his genius. "None other than Lex Luthor himself!" he boasts. Way to let the cat out of the bag. You're no Hurley. Oliver says that's impressive. "I thought he was dead," he notes. Toymaker says Oliver was supposed to be dead. He screams that Oliver was supposed to die in the explosion like everyone else. Oliver teases him, saying he sounds angry and should take his toys and go home. That makes Toymaker remember something. He walks over to pick up his monkey toy. While he does that, Oliver uses a tool he just swiped from inside the guy's coat to pick the lock on his right handcuff. Toymaker shows off a toy he made just for Oliver. It's a clapping monkey doll. Very conspicuously and loudly, Oliver picks the handcuff lock. Toymaker doesn't notice. He says that when the monkey claps 53 times, it'll be the last sound Oliver ever hears. "53, huh?" Oliver asks. Toymaker says he filed 53 patents while working for Oliver. The company made millions and he got nothing. Oliver's cheek twitches. As the monkey begins clapping rapidly, the guy goes over to Oliver and tries to mess with him. Oliver uses his free arm to put the guy in a headlock. He tells toymaker to unlock the other cuff. The monkey keeps banging the cymbals. "28 and counting" Oliver says. Actually, by the time he gets the words out, it's at about 50. That's a fast monkey. Oliver frees himself and pushes Toymaker back. The impact knocks the monkey onto its side on the floor. It stops clapping. Oliver pushes the guy down and cracks one of his fingers. He says he'll break the rest of those artistic little digits unless he tells him where to find Lex. The Toymaker whimpers. He's not so bold without his toys, is he? One last thing: can I just say that the bit with Oliver wrestling a fat man on a hospital bed while a cymbal-clapping toy monkey bomb nearby is one of the silliest things I've seen on a show that has been silly for eight long seasons? Just wanted to note that for the record. It looked really stupid.

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Smallville

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