Clark walks up the steps to the loft at the Kent Barnness of Last Crappy Barn Scenitude. The music is still going. "There's nothing I can say / Nothing I can do now," the lyrics say, which is pretty apt for Clark's passive ass. Lana is standing at the top of the barn, near the window. She's wearing all black, including a sleeveless top. The song climaxes as Clark and Lana look at each other longingly. Clark starts to walk toward Lana. She tells him to stop. She doesn't want to hurt him. "Lex already took care of that," Clark says. Mope. Clark asks if she talked to Dr. Science. "Can he help us?" he asks. Lana shakes her head. That's it, then? I thought the guy was a genius. Clark says he'll do whatever it takes to fix this and find a way for them to be together. Lana backs away. Lana says Dr. Science tried everything, but can't reverse the process. What has it been, half an hour? Give him some time! Geez. Clark stands there, silent. "I love you," Lana says, "I always will." Great. I thought they were going to get some closure up in here. But Clark's always going to crippled by this and Lois Lane, whomever she is, is going to get sloppy seconds. At best. Lana says she knows what to do with her life now. Get the fuck out of here, to start. "Life is... so precious... so beautiful," she says, laying down the platitudes. She says it's a gift to be able to protect life. She knows Clark feels the same way. It sure doesn't seem like it right now. "What we have is beautiful," he says. Not from this angle. Lana nods. She says they made their choice on that roof and they'd do it again. She says it's what they're driven to do, even if they can't do it together. Clark tells her not to leave. Clark says that if they can't be together, he still wants Lana in his life. Good lord, why? Lana says that's where Clark is stronger than her. She says to see Clark down the street every day and not be able to touch him... she trails off. "Stay," Clark tells her. She shakes her head. Lana is in tears as Clark walks to her. "Clark, don't," she warns. He fights past the pain and goes to her as she grimaces. Clark gasps and groans and limps as he walks to her. He almost stumbles, but makes it over. Lana tries. Clark grabs her arms. He pulls her closes and kisses her snotty, crying face. His mouth looks like it's aging and begins to wrinkle and crack. Ew! It's like kissing a rotting piece of cheese! Clark keeps kissing her as the wrinkles spread across his face. Gross! His face turns white and Clark looks like he's going to throw up. He finally backs away and falls. This is some fucked-up shit, right here. Lana loses it. She puts a hand on her mouth and walks away. "Goodbye, Clark," she says. She stops at the stairs, looks back at him but she's smiling. Clark is still kneeling near the window. She reminds him of the time they were at the cemetery and she introduced him to her mom and dad. Ah yes. 2-for-1 Pancake Night. He remembers it well. She says Clark told her she'd never be alone and that her parents would always be with her. Oh yeah, he was, what, 16? He probably had that written in an old spiral notebook for an English assignment. Lana says that if they stay in each other's hearts, Lana will always be with Clark. Dragging him down. Making him lame. "No matter what," she says, sniffling, "I love you." Clark scrunches up his face. Lana, red-eyed, turns and goes down the stairs in freaky slow motion. Clark, open-mouthed, watches her go. She walks, still in slow motion. Then she's gone. Finally. Damn. Clark finally gasps, "I love you." It might be poignant that he said it after she left, but we know she has superhearing. And all of Clark's other powers. And none of his weaknesses. Why is this show still about him? Clark stumbles over. He's in serious pain. The show goes to black and strings play us out so we don't have to look at his pathetic ass a moment longer.
Episode Report CardOmar G: F | 11744 USERS: D-
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