Naughty burial rites: two lab-coated dudes are pulling a stretcher through what looks like a broken-down haunted house with bad plumbing. And they're in a hurry, too. Everything is shot fast and grainy, like one of those commercials telling you the dangers of choosing the wrong antacid. I hear monkeys screeching, and that can only be good news. We zoom in on the very comely (yet dangerous) Dr. Poonie Tang. "Let's move," she says. Yeah, it's starting to smell in here with all the monkey shit. How about a nice 3/2 over on Granville Island? Poonie Tang unzips the body bag. Yep. He's dead, all right. "Syringe," she calls. She's got on blue gloves and a bulky-looking wristwatch. She plunges the syringe right into the middle of Deadbro's chest. Deadbro wakes up. Man, I'll bet he's got a lot of email waiting for him. He sits up, coughing. He has the breath of the dead. Poonie welcomes him back. Back to life, back to reality.
The hospital, the den of my nightmares. Brotherman is mad because his brother got smoked. Or at least, he was scheduled to be. They're asking some poor hospital worker why Deadbro was sent to be cremated. She says they didn't send him; Metropolis General did, for "organ donation." She shows some paperwork. Brotherman can't believe it. His brother was a selfish dick, apparently. "No," he says, shaking his head. The hospital worker suggests that maybe Brotherman didn't know his brother as well as he thought. "What are you talking about?" he yells. "How am I supposed to be calm when my brother's been carved up and burnt to a crisp?" Yeah. That does suck, dude. I'm with you on that one. The woman tries to explain, but Brotherman yells at her again and leaves the exceptionally dark room. Clark apologizes to the woman. Clark approaches Brotherman, who thinks the documents must have been forged. Clark thinks, "You mean like in a fire with a sword?"
Stately Luthor Manor at night. Lex is sitting in a chair, maybe not even wearing pants, and chewing out someone on the phone at an embassy for not keeping track of those wily North Koreans. He hangs up the phone just as Chloe, wearing a Chloeavage-revealing maroon outfit (rrrrooowwwwrr), approaches. Lex says that Dr. Poonie Tang has vanished without a trace. That's the thing about Tang. Just when you think you've got a handle on it, it disappears into the night, usually with somebody else. Chloe has something else for Lex. Besides the Chloevage. She says that it wasn't work or science that brought Poonie Tang to the U.S. twelve years ago; it was marriage. Did I mention that my fiancée is a brilliant molecular chemist who can bring people back from the dead? That's why Im marrying her, people. I'm gonna live forever, beeyatches! Chloe says that Tang married a rent-a-cop from Luthorcorp. Was he a working stiff? Ah ha ha ha ha ha ha! Dead people are comedy gold, baby. It's all coming clear for Lex: "So my father arranged a green card marriage." As Lex pours himself a tasty alcoholic beverage at the bar, Chloe says she tracked down the groom. Chloe says he's a watchdog at the "old Metron Pharmaceuticals building." Wasn't that where the old carnival used to be before those pesky kids solved the mystery of the scary pirate ghost? Lex says that building's been closed for seven years. Chloe says she thinks a delivery truck pulled up while she was being told to get lost. Lex says that his father's been "strangely stubborn" about liquidating the property. It looked pretty liquidated to me. Papa Luthor was waiting for a revitalization. Chloe says that the only thing getting revitalized around there is the graffiti. Chloe asks Lex to come with her to check it out again. Lex suggests that he should go on without Chloe -- not because he doesn't like her moxie, but because it could get dangerous. And Lex is to getting strung up and beaten like a piñata what hospital scenes are to my blood pressure. Chloe doesn't argue about not going.













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