So last week, we had Clark as a child, and then there's a Pampers commercial about a kid with a cape. Coincidence?
Kent Farm. Clark's gone back to his first-season mopey mode. MamaKent says she tried to get a hold of Luka's aunt, but her phone's been disconnected and there's no new number for her in Edge City. What about in Perpendicular Province? Cattycorner Town? Bo Duke, fondling a pair of work gloves, asks about the hospital Luka mentioned. Clark -- who must have been using a cell phone or something -- says that there's no Summerholt in Edge City, either. Bo asks when Clark last heard from the wee girly boy. Clark says that Luka sent an email a few weeks before about starting school and seemed "really psyched." Well, there's the lie right there. Bo says he's going to call the police. Clark tells MamaKent he's never heard Luka so scared. You knew him, what, three days? What was he most scared of? Your jump shot?
Smallville High. Pete and Clark are walking down the hall as Clark wonders if there might have been a warning sign to what happened to Luka. You know, all the things you're supposed to notice when someone's about to be kidnapped and experimented on for their psychic powers. Pete -- wearing a green long-sleeved shirt (he's Clark's kryptonite-buddy!) -- sighs and says he knows Luka meant a lot to Clark. Jealous? Pete says Clark should cut himself some slack. And a nice slice of that holiday beef log they sell at the mall. As they walk into the offices of The Torch, Chloe comes up wearing a big-ass medallion and asks if they remember cute Heinrich from the phone company. "You mean the Hungarian one with the toy scooter?" Pete says, revving his hand and saying the last word in a very funny way. Chloe takes offense and corrects Pete: he's Austrian and it's a Vespa. How come all the kooky town characters are always offscreen or infected by kryptonite? Chloe says her Austrian friend was able to trace back Luka's call to a Summerholt Neurological Institute, but it's not in Edge City. It's in Metropolis. "Well, that explains why we couldn't find it," Clark says. Um. Yeah. Chloe says that the SNI is strictly research; they don't take patients. Chloe asks why Luka would be in lockdown at a place that does esoteric brain research. That girl is way too smart for these clods. She's Hermione, and Clark needs a broomstick.
Polished mahogany. It must be the Lair of Lex. Lex walks down the house all smooth and worked up, with a clean white towel around his neck. "Mr. Mayor!" Lex calls out. "Thank you for seeing me on such short notice." It's Cigarette Smoking Man from The X-Files! Cancer Man shakes Lex's hand and asks how he can help his bald constituent. There's some framed comic books in the background we haven't seen before as Lex grabs a blu botol of water. Lex tells Cancer Man that his plant is doing an expansion, and they're waiting on some zoning permits. Cancer Man -- who is a lot more jovial here than in his last gig -- chuckles and says that that's how thing are with regulations and environmentalists. Just asks Lana's biological dad. "There's no such thing as a rubber stamp," Cancer Man says as they try to make him look all sinister with some major shadows cutting across his face. Jeez, get some lights in here. Lex says that if the project collapses, it'll cost the town lots of jobs. Cancer Man changes tracks. He says he's been friends with Papa Luthor since the magnificent bastard bought the old creamed corn plant. There's a good David Lynch joke in there somewhere, and I wish Djb were here to tell me what it is. The mayor does one of those things old robust men do where they take a big intake of breath while saying something sneaky. He says that Lex's dad was a big (breath) supporter. Lex, gripping his bottle, says he didn't know his dad was political. Cancer Man dances around that in his sneaky small-town way. "You want a bribe?" Lex finally asks. Cancer Man smiles. His ears go up and down. "I never said thaaaaat," he purrs. He says now that Lex is running his dad's plant, he should know how the town runs. Man, this guy is pretty craggy. Lex takes a few steps forward, as dramatic music plays, and says it's not his dad's plant anymore, and that he has his own way of doing business. First: houseboys. Lots of them. Cancer Man says he's up for re-election soon for his fourth term. He says this could be the start of a long-term relationship that could have "beneficial consequences" for the both of them. He takes a card from his inside pocket and hands it to Lex, saying, "Call this man. He'll explain how things work." Cancer Man starts walking out, but stops long enough to say, "Oh, and, uh, imagine how much you'll lose if construction shuts down." Lex grimaces. He totally needs to call David Duchovny. Not because of Cancer Man. Just cuz.