Multicultural dinner table. Elder Dude is telling the story about how, according to their legend, a man came from the stars and fell in love with the mother of their people. Out of that forbidden affair, the Cowachi people were born. At the mention of "Cowachi," Bo suddenly believes everything and decides he must worship his own son. "My life, my career, my coffee mug...it all makes sense now," Bo thinks. Clark asks if they know what star Numan came from. Kyla Ho gives Clark the googly eyes. She's hella cute, I'll give her that. Elder Dude says the man who couldn't keep it in his superpants flew back into the sky one day, promising to send another one day. "That would be this 'Numan' person you've been talking about, right?" Bo asks. Stupid white man. MamaKent goes to do some kitchen stuff. Kyla stares at Clark, biting her lip. Man, she's hornier than Christina Aguilera. Clark smiles bashfully. "You're not from around here, are you, Clark?" Elder Dude asks. Bo and MamaKent exchange a look. She says Clark is adopted. Clark says the symbols seem to make up an alphabet. Kyla Ho says that's the weird part. Elder Dude says his people don't have a written language, but he's seen a symbol here and there on artifacts. Their ancient atomic microwave oven, for instance. Kyla Ho says that given time, Elder Dude can probably figure out what the symbols are. That is, if Luthor doesn't get at them first. Can't he just transcribe them or take pictures of the cave wall or something? Clark says maybe MamaKent can talk to Papa Luthor. She's totally been put on the spot. "Mom's his executive assistant," Clark boasts. She says it won't be easy, and that the situation isn't so black-and-white. The office complex will create a thousand desperately needed jobs. "And you think that's more important than these caves?" Clark asks. Um, yeah, Clark. It is. Speaking of which, shouldn't you be thinking of getting a damn job to help support the farm instead of spending cash on dirt bike fuel? Ass. Awkward silence. "So, um," Bo says, "would anyone like coffee with their pie?" Sometimes Bo reminds me of Jimmy Neutron's dad.
The Barnness Of Gettin' It On-itude. Clark is showing off his big, phallic telescope. He asks if Kyla Ho wants a, heh heh, look.