Episode Report Card
Omar G: C- | 1 USERS: F
Mystery Sinus Theater

Now, I support a show that takes chances and does artsy things, and on the whole, Smallville is generally a very handsome-looking show. But this shot? Er, no. The sun is shining right at the camera, making everything bright orange. I imagine this must have been painful to watch in HD. And the shot goes on like that for a good ten seconds. A car pulls up, and we can make out the shape of the fallen barn door in the field. We hear Lois and Chloe get out of a car, Lois is saying that she's no Chicken Little. She asks how it's possible that this barn ended up miles away from the Kent farm. The camera moves slightly, and we finally get out of the blaring burning of the sun. Still lots of glare and sunspots, though. Chloe admits that it's weird, but not Wall of Weird weird. Chloe says that it's a "microverse." Did I get that right? The only microverse I found online was one related to Marvel comics. Lois asks what that is. Chloe says that it's a mini-tornado caused by a sudden change in temperature, and not that uncommon in the midwest. Chloe has definitely got her bullshit mojo going. Lois says that it was sunny and 75. She takes a picture with her cameraphone. Chloe says that it must have happened in the upper atmosphere, where Lois couldn't feel the barometric pressure change. Yes, Chloe, but you're forgetting that Lois's chest would have sensed that. Lois says that either Chloe has been watching too much Weather Channel, or her job has turned her into a hardened skeptic. Chloe says that she's just being realistic. Lois reminds Chloe that she once said science can't explain much of what happens in the town. Chloe smiles big and says that this incident falls under the remaining fraction of things that can. She adds that, sometimes, the answer to a weird occurrence is no further away than the front page of Scientific American. Chloe puts her hand on the barn door, and it slowly falls with a giant creak. I think that was supposed to be comedic. Ha.

Lexy bondage. Lex is still lying down. The second captor is telling Young Busey that he's not supposed to have a gun, and that they were specifically told not to use violence. Psst. You're not supposed to say that in front of the people you kidnap, dude! Busey says thathe doesn't answer to anybody, especially the other dude's boss. He wants to know how Lex is bulletproof; that info is very valuable on the open market. Wussy Guy tries again, but Busey stops him and says he's an "entre-preneur" like it's two words. Busey warns Wuss that he can join his venture or end up like "the Pontius guy." Busey holds up his gun. "Hey, Lex!" he calls out. Lex wearily turns his head. Busey wants to experiment. Lex says that he doesn't remember anything happening. Busey says that he wants to see it happen again, and shoots Lex in the upper arm. Lex screams. Busey comes closer, smiling. He shakes his head like, "Ain't that a shame?" It sort of is.

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