Smallville
Sneeze

Episode Report Card
Omar G: C- | 1 USERS: F
YOU GRADE IT
Mystery Sinus Theater

Clark knows better than to mess with a cornered rodent. He exits. Clark stands in the hallway, while on the other side of the door, Lana rushes to a phone. She dials the number on the business card Lex gave her. In the hall, Clark hears all, including the P.I.'s name on the voicemail message. Clark zips out of there with just enough information to nudge the plot along for another scene. Lana hangs up the phone without leaving a message. Instead, she starts digging through Lex's desk. She finds a snazzy remote control. A panel of shelves recesses into the wall, and a screen comes down. On it are five panels -- four small, one big. Each video panel shows surveillance from different cameras. The center panel is a replay of Lana undressing in her room. We see her take off her shirt and bra from behind. Why isn't this in real time? Lana is visibly upset. She presses a button, and it zips ahead to the meeting Lex had with Pontius in the office. Lana hears Pontius give the address for the warehouse. Shenanigans!

The warehouse. Lex, shot in the arm, is still in peril. Busey asks what turns some weak, hairless punk into some superhuman goliath. Cialis? "I honestly don't know," Lex mutters. Busey doesn't believe him. He says he knows that LuthorCorp does experiments involving genetically enhanced strength. Lex turns to him with interest. Busey asks what Lex did to himself. "You really want to know?" Lex asks. "A being from another dimension -- actually, another planet -- inhabited my body and gave me powers." Lex says that it's ridiculous but true, and that the power left him when the alien vacated the premises. Pull the other one, weak hairless man! Lex says that's all he knows. Also, he don't know much, but he knows he loves Clark. And that may be all he needs to know. Gun to the neck again. Busey cocks it dangerously. Insert Lex + "cock to the neck" joke here. "Are you mocking me?" Busey asks. No; if Lex were making fun of you, he'd keep saying you look like Jake Busey. Lex asks why he'd mock a guy who just shot him. Given how many people have shot Lex, he may be running out of people in the world to mock. Busey moves the gun out of frame and says that the next wound will sting more than the last one did: "You want to keep your new girlfriend happy?" Holy crap, he was gonna shoot Lex's dick off! That is hardcore, Smallville. I tip my hat to your threat of peniscular violence. Lex stops him immediately. Shoot his arms all you want, but keep away from Li'l Lex, buddy. Lex gives in. He says that there's a serum in a lab on the 33rd floor of LuthorCorp. It's in a vault in the center cabinet: "The code is Julian452." He purses his lips and munches his pride a bit. Busey tells his lackey to go check it out.

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Smallville

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