Back at the prom, Clark spots Lois. He tries to apologize, but she's already gotten the scoop from Clark's parents. Lois snarks that it's the last time she's letting PMP do her hair. Clark tries to apologize again. Lois says she never got to go to her own senior prom. I guess the prom she mentioned before was junior year. She complains that the punch could use some kick. Ha. Kung-Fu joking. Clark smiles. Lifehouse start to play a slow, mopey song befitting Clark Kent. Clark, sensing opportunity, tells Lois that since she got all dressed up, maybe she'd like to dance. "Chivalry noted," she says, but adds that she's not the one he should be dancing with. We all take a deep breath. Lois nods toward the door. "She is," she says. Chloe, right? Nooooo! Wrong! It's Lana, wearing a strange white dress and sporting 1940s hair. What the...What is THIS? It's not enough to kick Chloe around for four years, you have to put her through this crap again when she's Prom Queen? I'm sure there's a note written somewhere back around Season 1 that reads, "Clark and Lana have to dance together at senior prom," but they sure as hell haven't earned it. This absolutely sucks. On more levels than I care to list. I'd put up a bigger fight, but I'm so, so, tired of this shit. Aren't you? Haven't we had enough Lana for ten lifetimes already? Is it never enough? Clark, all goofy-eyed, goes to dance with Lana. It's as retch-worthy as you can imagine.
After selling her cousin's soul for $1.95, Lois goes to see how Chloe is doing. Freakin' depressed is how she's doing. Lois tells her that a year from now, it'll all feel like a lifetime ago. Chloe smiles and says that's funny, because it feels like yesterday when Clark abandoned "that nervous freshman on the dance floor." Ouch. Lois pep-talks Chloe, telling her that she's going to go to Metropolis to be a big-shot reporter: "Do you really think Clark Kent will be able to keep up with you?" Chloe, a better person than all of this bullshit, says she thinks Clark has more to offer than Lois realizes. Lois says that she wouldn't bet on it. Chloe just gives her a sweet look. Run, Chloe. Run far far away from this show. Go kick it with Veronica Mars or something.
Nausea follows. Clark goes to Lana. He asks for this dance. "I thought you'd never ask," she responds. He takes her hand. They go to the middle of the dance floor. Lois watches Chloe. Chloe's tender heart breaks for the millionth time. Fuck you guys. Seriously. Fuck you very much for making us have to see this all over again. Lifehouse, on behalf of Miles and Al, would like us to know that you just can't take your eyes off of Lana. Furthermore, everything she does is beautiful and everything she does is right. MamaKent and Bo dance. Clark and Lana get closer. The lyrics are just absurdly about Lana, proving yet again that the show was misnamed from its original Lanaville. At the door, Jason arrives just in time to see Lana and Clark dancing. That's great, because did you hear that he's a bad guy now? No, it's true! Lana looks content against Clark's chest. He doesn't give shit one about Chloe, and when he becomes Superman, he's still going to be the Superman who fucked with Chloe's feelings for four years and who treated all of his friends like he was a supreme asshat and who lied to everybody, broke the law whenever possible, and was responsible for more than a few teen deaths. So choke on that shit, Superman. I hope Batman kicks your ass someday.