Smallville
Splinter

Episode Report Card
Omar G: B | Grade It Now!
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Paranoid Man-droid

Clark notices a prompt and a beep on Chloe's computer signaling that she has a new email message. He sits and examines Chloe's email. Apparently, she's not working too much, because all the messages are either newsroom memos, or messages from Lana, Clark, or Papa Luthor. Clark's email, amusingly, just says, "Hey Chloe!" Lana's subject line is, "You coming out?" I think that one was supposed to go to Clark. Papa Luthor's messages have "No Subject," "Hello Chloe...," and "Re: Your question" as subject lines. Clark blinks and double-clicks Papa Luthor's latest message. The "No Subject" message contains text that reads, "THERE ARE NO SECRETS." Chloe -- who returns to the room carrying a fax and some Chloevage in a smart business jacket -- says that there's a problem; the vehicle she looked up doesn't seem to exist. A bit much skin for the newsroom, don't you think, Chloe? As Chloe tries to ask if Clark is sure about the plate number, Clark interrupts to ask why she's getting messages from Papa Luthor. Indignantly, Chloe asks, "You read my emails?" Clark stands and glares, telling her to answer the question. Chloe says that her job requires her to talk to a lot of people, including "moral pygmies" like Papa Luthor. Clark, looking a bit strung-out, asks if Chloe told Papa Luthor his secret. He says that only three people in town know his secret: his mom, his dad, and Chloe. Chloe lowers her voice to ask if he thinks she sold him out: "Clark, I would never, ever do that." Clark considers her for a moment, and then tells her, "I can't believe I trusted you." Well, really, Clark, you didn't. Chloe found out about your powers on her own. Chloe says she didn't say anything. Clark, not caring, walks out.

Lair of Lex. Lex angrily throws down some papers and says into his cell phone, "I'm paying you for results, Griff, not excuses. Get it done!" "Griff"? "Results"? Great that we know what's going on here. Lana walks through the door. I think I finally figured it out: Lex has no front door. It must be hard to find a good one for a castle, but while it's on back-order, people can just walk in and out through the open door frame. Lex, looking a bit surprised to see her (get that door fixed!), tells "Griff" that he'll have to call him back. Oh, sweet, sweet Griff. Did you and Lex have a tiff? Lana asks if this is a bad time. "For you?" he says. "Never." Lana sits herself down and thanks Lex for the meteor rock he sent. She tells him it's an amazing find, and that she'd like to know more about it. "What rock would that be?" he asks. Modern. It's all over the former alternative stations. Lana says playfully, "Uh, the silver meteor rock?" Lex says that's intriguing, but that he's never seen one of those before. What color is it? Lex says it wasn't from him. Lana tells him that there was a note attached with his name on it. Lex says that someone's playing a game with Lana, because he doesn't know anything about it. Sounds like a pretty dumb game. How about sending Lana Mario Party 7? ["That game's too fun for stupid Lana." -- Wing Chun] Lana, whisper-accusatory, says, "Just like you don't know anything about the spaceship that landed during the last meteor shower." Lex does the thing where he ducks his head when he's been caught in a lie or an embarrassing truth. "That's different," he tells her. "Whyyyy?" Lana purrs. More forthright than usual, she asks, "Why is it different, Lex?" Deep breath. Lex says there are some doors that can't be closed once they're open. Like his front door. "Thanks," Lana says, pissed-off as she gets up to leave. "Did you get that from a fortune cookie?" Wow, Lana's really got Chow Mein on the brain. Lex, standing, changes course and says that everything he's done has been to protect Lana. And to play house with a farmboy. Lana asserts that she doesn't need protection; she needs the truth. No more thecreths, Lex! "Then I have something to show you," Lex says. He looks a little exhausted.

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