Isis Foundation. Chloe is standing at her battle station, looking at pages from the newspaper on multiple screens as Clark whooshes in. "Chloe," Clark says as he enters. That's my name, don't wear it -- aw, fuck, it's been eight seasons. Shit's WORN OUT ALREADY. Clark says that Stiletto is their only hope to find the laptop. The thug Clark went to see at the jail posted bail before he ever got in a cell. Chloe hasn't found Stiletto, but she discovered something else. She's on a Web site called "Superhero Tracker" and she types in a giant search box, "Blur-Etto." "Blur-Etto?" Clark asks. Chloe says you know you've made it when you have your own fan site. Minus the dash, they're talking about slash pairing. You know, "Chlark," "Lexana," "Clex." Disturbingly meta. Chloe says the fans are doing a little matchmaking. Clark reads messages off a discussion forum (which has the word "on-line" -- what is it with all these hyphens?) that include "I'm sure Stiletto can take care of things herself," and "Yeah but... Nobody understands a hero's life of solitude better than a fellow cape." And then, "These two lonely hearts belong together!" Squee! Really, the spelling and grammar is much too good for most slash boards. Sorry. Clark asks who makes this stuff up. Chloe asks if they're that far off the mark. Clark says that romance is the last thing on his mind right now. The first five things are: cheese, the pails that go under cows when you milk them, why some doorknobs are knobs and others are handles, whatever happened to Remy Zero, and the color peach. Chloe says that Clark thought he'd found his "super-powered soulmate," but hasn't said one word about Lana since she left. Ouch! Sting! Put some Bactine on that! "That's because I have you," Clark says stiffly. There's not really a good meaning for what he just said, no matter how you take it. Chloe says she hasn't been much of a sidekick lately, and Oliver and his crew have been MIA. She thinks Clark might need someone else with a double life to confide in. Clark ignores that, saying he'd rather focus on getting the laptop back. Chloe gives up with the romance. She doesn't think they'll be able to summon the new hero with a stiletto signal off a Klieg light. Clark frowns. The Hell is a Klieg light? It's the kind of signal light a much cooler superhero might have thought of. But how would you make a silhouette of a blur?
Episode Report CardOmar G: C | 1422 USERS: C+
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