Smallville

Episode Report Card
Omar G: C | 4 USERS: B+
YOU GRADE IT
Maybe We Could Call Her 'The Tit'

Daily Planet, nighttime. Clark is messing with the squelch (or is it "the labia?") of the police scanner. The camera pans to the right and we see Lois at the desk directly in front of Clark. She is typing. She asks if it's not Clark's bedtime. Clark says he's finishing work while he's still motivated. She sighs and flips through some papers. Clark eyes his backpack, on the floor next to his desk. The playful "Office Work For Idiots" music is trying to coax some life into this scene. Lois looks down at her own satchel. It looks awfully small for her leather costume. Lois complains it's a slow night. Clark says he's fine if she wants to go. He jokes that he'll pass on the Red-Blue Blur's call if he gets through. Lois snarks about Clark's non-existent hero skills. She keeps teasing him, and Clark finally asks if it's because he's just a copyboy. "No, it's because you're doing way better than anyone expected!" she snaps. This compliment was brought to you by the emotions annoyance and impatience. Just then, the scanner breaks through with some activity. Clark and Lois both get to their feet. Clark says he needs to go feed Shelby. In Smallville? What the fuck, Clark? Does Lois think you can teleport Alpo? Lois says she should hit the gym. They both grab their bags and go. Clark watches Lois leave and then superzips up the stairs.

Metropolis flyover, again. At Ace of Clubs, Jimmy walks in. The place is empty, so it must have cleared out for the night. Blago and the buddy who was arrested are waiting for him. Jimmy, holding his camera, says he's sorry he's late, but he got caught up in another project. Blago takes the camera and teases Jimmy, asking about the "tele-macro zoom." He asks if Jimmy used to be a journalist and what he's doing here. Jimmy, all druggy, doesn't answer. Blago starts looking at photos on the camera. He sees a wedding photo of Jimmy and Chloe. Blagojevich jokes that "Blondie" looks a lot different when she's smiling. Jimmy wants his camera back. They push him back when he reaches for it. Blago finds the photos of Stiletto and suddenly he's not so jokey anymore. "Do you know her?" he asks. [I love that he kind of takes Jimmy being married to his latest victim in stride, but Jimmy knowing the woman who beat him up is intolerable. - Z] Jimmy lies, badly, saying it was just a fluke. Just a fluke that he took 100 photos of her as she posed? Blago asks where to find her. Blago's sidekick pushes Jimmy toward the balcony. Blagojevich slaps Jimmy. Then Jimmy gets punched. Jimmy maintains that he doesn't know where Stiletto went. Jimmy is bleeding from a cut on his cheek. Blago grabs both sides of Jimmy's head. "What is wrong with you?" he asks. "It's like you want me to kill you." Oh, the drama! He smacks Jimmy one more time, hard, across the face. Jimmy's camera goes flying. Jimmy lands hard on the floor. He's out. Blago asks his second-in-command to go "squeeze Blondie" while they try to get info off the laptop. With pleasure, sir!

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Smallville

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