Episode Report Card
Omar G: B- | Grade It Now!
Little Orphan Luka

Kent farm at breakfast time. We come in first on the windmill outside to signify that, what, air is blowing? Great. Duly noted. In the kitchen, MamaKent walks in and sees a big stack of pancakes on the table. She calls for Clark, but it's Luka, walking in with a pitcher of orange juice. The boy wants to be their manservant. The boy, who is like an older, less strange Haley Joel Osment, says he wanted to make himself useful, when Bo walks in and asks what's up with all the goshdarn pancakes. He makes some noise about how maybe Clark should take after him. Oh, ready to trade in the old adoptee already, are we? Then, here comes the weirdness: the kid asks how they like their cakes and then proceeds to guess correctly before they can answer that MamaKent likes powdered sugar on hers. Bo likes scrambled eggs, then milk and honey with his coffee. Wuss. The parents are very impressed, and when they ask how he knew that, he lies that he noticed MamaKent eyeing the powdered sugar when she walked in. Given all the superpowers they've been exposed to, they're still remarkably naïve. Clark comes downstairs and hears about the kid's cooking. "You're making me look bad," Clark says, but not in a mean way. Luka asks what Clark wants for breakfast. Clark yawns and doesn't answer. The kid looks confused. Clark says he'll have pancakes and starts to grab them as Luka stares, perplexed. Bo breaks the awkward moment by asking if Luka's sure he doesn't remember what happened the night before or why he was out so late at night. Luka says, a little too strongly, that he said he didn't remember. More silence. "I'm not hiding anything," Luka says, then gets up and walks out of the room. "Nobody said you were, buddy," Clark calls after him. Uh-oh. I hope Clark/Luka buddyism isn't anything like Clark/Lex buddyism.

Outside, Clark finds Luka sitting on a tractor reading a comic book. He's already taking after Clark by moping about how MamaKent and Bo won't want him to stay since they don't believe him. He reveals a little too much by asking what happens if he doesn't have a home and if he did bad things before his "amnesia." Clark says everything'll be fine. Then he asks about Luka's comic. It's a fictional title called Warrior Angel. Clark asks why he likes it so much. Because it's someone who helps people who can't protect themselves. It's a cheese satellite! Beaming down a cheesy premonition! My God. A beam of light made entirely of cheddar. It's beautiful. Luka says suddenly that he likes being around Clark. "It's peaceful," he says. So far we know this kid can probably read minds, but that he's not getting anything from Clark. Is that because of Clark's superpowers or because Clark's head is just devoid of any thought? A lilting song by Jason Schwartzman's band Phantom Planet is a nice relief from the crap rock usually played on this show. As the song begins, Clark invites the boy to come shoot some hoops. Clark dribbles a bit (the ball, people, the basketball) and jumps up, dunking it succinctly. It's a male-bonding montage! The kid granny-shoots the ball. Clark gives him some tips, even though we already know he sucks at b-ball and gets his ass whipped by Jocko Whitney on a regular basis. Somehow it works: the kid shoots and scores. Clark even says words to that effect.

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