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Dissing Cousins
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description!

Oh, thank goodness. No "previously on Smallville" to slog through this week. We open straightaway to the night Clark sent the Kandorians to whatever otherworldly place he sent them to. We once again see the dark smoke that showed up at the end of the season's first episode. It swirls along the ground near the forgotten crystal console and then over to the edge of the rooftop where it condenses enough to show a foggy version of Darkseid's masked face and torso. Darkseid goes "RAWR!" and then explodes into a bunch of crows that disperse across the night sky, blotting out the permanently full moon with their flapping wings.

In a dark radio booth in another part of the city, a man quietly but urgently speaks to his listeners. "I need you to understand that," he says. "I need you get behind that." Granted I don't know much about the radio industry, but everything in his claustrophobic little environs looks like it came from Orson Welles's props closet. He's talking about aliens of the illegal sort (as opposed to the interstellar sort) and how they're taking American jobs. He's upset that they're "thumbing their noses at truth, justice and the American way." His platform seems to be much the same as many a conservative radio personality, but he's not a bombastic Rush Limbaugh. He seems almost meek, really. Then suddenly there comes a tapping, as of someone gently rapping, rapping at his chamber door. Except it's his window, but whatever. Lightning flashes and this soft-spoken fellow turns toward the window to see a raven sitting there. He gives it a curious look before turning back to his microphone. He thanks his listeners. "We're small, but we're loud," he says. Only if you turn up the volume on your radio really high, though. He signs off for the night: "This is Gordon Godfrey, saying night, y'all. Stand up for the American dream." He takes off his headset and hears a low rumbling sound, not unlike Lost's smoke monster. He turns back to the window just in time to see a stream of kamikaze crows break through the glass. Birds and black smoke fly at him. He falls back, screaming. Okay, now you're loud. His eyes go black.

We move to the present day. A small crowd gathers in that quiet little street where most of the outside shots of Metropolis seem to be shot. Godfrey stands at a podium, surrounded by red, white and blue bunting. Beside him is a long table filled with hardcover books titled Super-Heroes or Super-Menace? by Godfrey himself. That they were slapped together quickly is made obvious by the terrible typesetting, not to mention the MS Paint graphic of the Blur's "S" inside a circle-backslash symbol. Gordon tells the audience: "You will not be saved! Don't put your faith in this hero menace!" He goes on about why he wrote the book and how terrified he is for the nation and the innocent people who look up to the vigilantes. Clark stands in the audience looking uncomfortable as people around him clap. Lois walks into view behind him. She pauses, looking at him before approaching. Godfrey is still going on about shadows and darkness and lurking, and whatnot. Lois whispers, "Fifty bucks says the crackpot with the Blur in his bonnet is just gunning for a little attention." Clark smiles and turns around to give her a big hug. She apologizes for saying goodbye through a letter. Clark waves it off and says he figured something just happened. Lois teases him: "You mean something like 'Go to Africa, Lois'?" The clown music pipes up, annoying as ever. Clark stammers, admitting he did tell her that, but... "I thought you wanted me to take the job?" Lois asks, not letting him off the hook." He stammers some more as she allows him to flail. Finally, he asks if they're partners again. She gives him a smile and answers in the affirmative. "Unless you're disappointed I'm not blonder?" she asks. Clark suddenly remembers Cat, who was supposed to meet him there to cover the book signing. Lois says Cat was "conveniently volunteered" to cover a dog sled race... in Alaska. Isn't it, like, June for the show? Poor overheated huskies.

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