Smallville

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Omar G: B | Grade It Now!
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Arrow Smith
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description!

Metropolis at night! Awwwww yeah! I'm gonna get my urban blight on! We hover over the city for a bit and then cut to something called the "Rainforest Preservation Foundation." We just had a major hurricane, the economy is in the men's urinal and nobody can afford gas. Let's save the rainforest! It's a gala party with a jungle theme. Some people are dressed in loincloths and flowers. Guess who's crashing the party? Chloe, wearing a nice strapless dress, and Clark, wearing a surprisingly sharp suit, are at the bar. Clark is wearing his press pass on his breast pocket. Yet, he's drinking a martini on the job. No, Clark! Bad journalist! Chloe jokes that global warming is just an excuse for taking your clothes off. You don't need an excuse, Chloe. Clark wisely hands the martini to Chloe instead of drinking it himself. He says that Oliver has raised a lot of money for this event. It's $500 a plate. $1,000 if you want food on it. Chloe says she's happy to hang with Clark, but surprised that Lois disengaged Clark from her hip. Clark says they're not always together. Chloe says that Clark sees Lois more than she sees Jimmy. Maybe it's because Jimmy has been missing for two episodes. Clark asks what Chloe is trying to say. Chloe gives a wistful, "Never mind." She says she always thought she'd be the one circling Clark's typos. Oh, I'm sure there are plenty to go around. And also: shut up, Chloe. You're the one who gave up journalism for counseling. Clark says that Lois doesn't circle typos, she underlines them two or three times. Oh, my AP Stylebook hurts. Clark says that Lois couldn't leave early because she already pissed off the boss, Tess. Chloe calls her a "Luthor wannabe." Clark says that Tess may be a Lex supporter, but that she's been civil with him so far. Chloe thinks Clark's opinion has something to do with Tess being a total hottie. Clark says that Lex knows his secret and that if Tess is following Lex's footsteps, she may find it, too. Chloe adds that if Lex chose Tess to carry on in his name, she must be dealt with carefully. Chloe notices that Oliver is walking in with a very attractive, very tiny model who is wearing a stunning blood red dress. Photographers, who are somehow inside the party instead of on the red carpet outside, snap tons of photos. Oliver raises a glass as his model friend walks away. Oliver takes a sip as the photos continue. He tries to put his drink on a tray, but stumbles and almost falls. Nice one, Chevy Chase. Chloe jokes that Oliver's party must have started in the limo. Clark doesn't think Oliver would show up drunk to his own party. Oliver doesn't look so great. From his point-of-view, we see the flashing cameras dance around in a drunken haze. Oliver touches his tie, then stumbles again, landing on a nearby gentleman. He hits the ground. Clark helps Oliver up as Chloe tells the paparazzi to back off. Clark says he knows Oliver's not drunk. Clark wants to get Oliver to a hospital. Oliver, sweaty, says, "No! No hospital!" Clark asks what's wrong. Too... many... hospital scenes... on this show! Please! I'm begging you! Take him somewhere else! "Poison," Oliver says. Dramatic music plays. Oliver says he has 12 hours to live. That's half a season! Oh, wait. He probably means in episode-time.

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Smallville

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