Commercials. The WB presents What I Like About You. Come on, Amanda Bynes. It's time to move on, already.

Smallville High School at night. Only it looks like a drawing of the school, not an actual filmed shot. Maybe that's just my imagination. Clarkionel is inside in the Torch newsroom, trying to log in to the LuthorCorp corporate network. He's still wearing Clark's nice blue shirt. The website won't accept his password. Clarkionel slams his hand on the desk, taking out a huge chunk of wood with his fist. "Lex," he whispers angrily. "He changed the password." Did you think he wouldn't?

Chloe, wearing a navel-baring olive top and chunky jewelry, comes in carrying a few binders. She notices Clark's fashion statement. "Was flannel too five-minutes-ago?" she asks. She notices the desk fisting and asks, "Who pulled a Paul Bunyan on the desk?" "It was that way when I got here," Clarkionel says playfully. "Weird," says Chloe. Why doesn't Chloe come to the conclusion that Kryptonite-infected termites are to blame? Clarkionel starts playing his little mind games, telling Chloe that he's concerned about her well-being, and asking what she'd do if Papa Luthor got out of prison. She asks if the "Lionel Luthor alert has suddenly been elevated to orange." Clarkionel smiles smugly. She asks if he knows something she doesn't. Clarkionel rolls toward Chloe in the office chair. "Nooo," he drawls out, "but it always pays to be cautious." Chloe dismisses his concerns; she says Papa Luthor won't be eligible for parole until he's about 112. Clarkionel starts to move toward Chloe as he says that Papa Luthor may get out sooner than she thinks. Chloe backs away, laughing and telling Clark that he's been sacked one too many times. Football, people, football. Don't get naughty on me, here. Clarkionel says that may be true. He says he feels like he's looking at Chloe through a different pair of eyes. He licks his lips. Total Raising Victor Vargas move, that. He says he sees her in a whole new light. Chloe asks what that means. Clarkionel leans in for the kill: "I have to confess that I...I find you absolutely fascinating." Chloe looks at him, falling for the treacherous hook. He says it's the twinkle in her eye...that sexy smile...wait, it's Papa Luthor! Ew! He touches her face with his finger and starts talking about her skin. "Clark, what are you doing?" Chloe asks. Don't you find me...pleasing? Clarkionel closes his eyes a little and says it's what he's wanted to do for a very, very long time. He leans in for a kiss. Chloe closes her eyes and moves to kiss him back. Clarkionel exhales at her. "Don't you wish," he whispers. Daaaaaaamn! Cold-blooded! Chloe is shocked. "Miss Sullivan," Clarkionel says, off to the side, and walks off. Chloe is left with tears brimming in her eyes. Wow. Magnificent Bastardom in a male-model package! Who knew it was possible?