Commercials. Bolt on DVD. Against all odds, this one looks like a winner.

Daily Planet, daytime. Clark throws his ridiculous backpack on the desk and the desk is like, "Oh, no you don't. That thing is ugly." Clark has his computer's browser set to the Metropolis Police Web site. A pop-up window helpfully alerts him to a police stand-off at Main and 5th. Instead of heading over there, Clark sits down. He is a man of serious inaction. Clark watches the word "Alert!" blink several times before Tess Mercer shows up at his desk saying, sarcastically, "Nifty knapsack, Kent!" Psst, Clark... I don't think she really means it! It's not nifty at all! She asks if he's on his way to P.E. See? I told you! Clark says, unconvincingly, that he just got back from the gym. Tess tells Clark that if he wants to graduate from the bullpen to the corner office (hasn't he only been working for like two or three months?) that he needs to look the part. Age about 30 years and look stressed about your industry going down the toilet. Tess carries off Clark's bag without asking, saying they can find him something a little less High School Musical and a little more Louis Vuitton. Clark worriedly grabs at the backpack, saying he doesn't want his boss going through his underwear. He neglected to add the word "smelly." Tess says she'll take Clark shopping when they get back. He asks where they're going. Tess says L.A. Wouldn't the shopping be better in L.A. than in the middle of Kansas? No disrespect, Metropolis. Smiling, Tess says she's announcing the new Mercer Media Group. MMG in the house, bitches! Tess says she's holding a press conference and needs a friendly reporter to lob softballs. Unless she means actual softballs, that's a lame way to run a newspaper. Clark can't believe he's going. Tess says every cub reporter gets his big break and this happens to be Clark's. She knows this from how many years of publishing experience? Tess tells Clark not to underestimate his talents. "There's no telling where they'll take you. The sky is the limit," she says. Are we done here? Please say we're done here. Clark looks disappointed. She asks if Clark has more important things to do. Clark frowns. "No. Of course not." The elevator dings behind Tess. Without moving, she says the only reporters she wants working for her are ones who take their job seriously. She finally stands aside and lets Clark walk into the elevator. She gives him the sly sideway eyes as the elevator door closes in front of them.