Episode Report Card
Omar G: C- | 1 USERS: F
Hell Hath No Lana...

The Talon. The marquee says, "Super Mocha Mondays." Hey, where's Kara all this week? She's not at the farm and she's not working. It's daytime. Inside, Chloe is grabbing coffees for herself and Lana and saying that she really needed this girls' night out. Only it's not night. And there's only two girls. Lana knows that Clark asked Chloe to babysit her. As they sit down, Chloe warns Lana to watch herself. Lana, patronizingly, says she wishes Chloe could know how this feels. She says it's like you can do anything and nothing can hurt you. "Like you're untouchable," she says breathlessly, "I've been given a gift!" Chloe has heard it all before. She gives Lana a glazed look. Lana says she can unlock any door, slip into any room unnoticed and eavesdrop on any conversation. Yeah, those are all sneaky, bad things, Lana. Got anything to help the Forces of Good? Chloe asks if she's joining the KGB. Lana says Chloe is always asking Clark to get articles for her. She thinks Chloe would definitely use these powers if she had them. Chloe says Lana's not a reporter. "I may not be. But I do have a story to tell," Lana tells her. Can we just skip it, maybe? Chloe asks, "What's churning in that head of yours, Lana?" Molasses and corn meal. Lana doesn't answer.

Stately Luthor Manor, nighttime. Lex is having a girls' night in. One of his henchmen is bent over and Lex is in front of him, which is really the wrong way to get this party started. The dude opens an expensive silver briefcase to show one of those cylinders you use at the bank to send stuff in the pneumatic tube. It's full of glowing green tubes. Lex asks what he's looking at. "We don't really know," the well-dressed scientist says. Well, awesome. Go pick up your check at the cashier's window. He tells Lex that the metallic dust somehow liquefied. There's a cranberry-can-shaped black jelly at the bottom of the cylinder. The green tubes are above it. "On its own?" Lex asks. Lex complains that the dust was the last thing he had from the alien technology, all that's left of Milton Fine's ship. He wants to know how dust can turn into liquid. The scientist says that Lex is seeing what he gave him. It's an airtight container and has been guarded. "It's evolving," says Kenneth Branagh Lite. He says the liquid is sentient. Like Kool-Aid Man. "It's alive," he says ominously. We see a close-up of the tube and the black liquid spikes at the top. Scary! The dude gives Lex a funny shaped hard drive. He says it's his report and all the data on Project Scion. Apparently, the kids really like the sporty Toyota Scion and enjoy its Auxiliary input for plugging in an iPod. It's all in the report. Ken Branaugh says the organism exhibits conscious behavior. Almost like Lana. He says that without Kryptonite and low levels of radiation to keep it contained, it would have mobility. We see the black liquid struggling scarily up the side of the container. Spooky shit, man! "It appears to want out," the man says. Just like me. Lex stares. He thinks this is pretty badass.

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