Metropolis. The Daily Planet building is surrounded by smoke and unnatural pink and purple skies. The camera roams around the basement to find Chloe hidden under a desk. She's rifling through papers and making notes. She's frustrated, trying to make sense of a bunch of alien symbols. Chloe hears a door open, and then footsteps. She reaches forward and grabs the gun Papa Luthor gave her. Brooding music. Chloe slowly gets up in her low-cut top, giving the empty office a free show. She hears a noise, spins, and then spins again. She fires her gun, shattering a big panel of glass. Chloe's hair goes all in her face. "Whoa, whoa, whoa, don't shoot!" someone calls. You might think it's that little nerdy dude from X2, but it's actually his brother. He explains that he works there, and then recognizes Chloe. "Hey!" he says. "This isn't because I didn't call you back, is it?" he tries, grinning. I hope that's a joke, because you took her virginity, dude. Chloe returns the smile. "Jimmy Olsen," she says. Jimmy purses his lips. Chloe may just get laid this season after all.
Lair of Lex. Zod is still dragging Lana around. She asks how he knew to come here. She says that there must still be some Lex in that body for him to remember where to go. Zod grabs a laptop swarming with Kryptonian symbols. "You had feelings for this human," he says. Lana says that she did. Zod faces her. "His feelings for you were also strong. They left an unpleasant taste when I consumed his essence," Zod says. No, that was just garlic from Lana's lunch when you put your tongue down her esophagus. Zod says that the computer virus crippling the world could only be stopped at the point of infection. He says that's the only reason he's there.
Zod busts out the big octagon coaster the spaceship spat out, and puts it near the computer. It glows orange. Zod places it on the laptop's keyboard, and the thing begins to spin around. I want one of those! On the screen, a map of the U.S. appears. "You got rid of the virus," Lana says flatly. Zod says that he needed to acquire information. Such as: who is this Tila Tequila, and why won't she friend-add Zod on MySpace? It is very frustrating! The lights overhead flicker. "Power," Lana says. Helpful, Lana. Zod says that it would take days to restore the power, if the humans even had that long. "The Pentagon," Lana says at it appears on screen. Wow, Lana. I can't wait to hear the episode commentary on this one: "Basically, they just turned all the stuff in parentheses in the script into dialogue for me." Zod says that there's something at the Pentagon he needs. Rumsfeld's balls, for starters. Zod says that the black ship is going to send a pulse around the world, reforming the Earth's crust. "Into what?" Lana asks. "My home," he answers. "Krypton," Lana figures. He says that this time it'll be perfect -- an empire ruled by the bloodline of Zod. Lana thought he needed the black ship. Zod sighs: "Its hard drive can still initiate the pulse," but he needs military satellites to broadcast it. The Kryptonian technology runs on hard drives? No wonder they destroyed their own planet. You can't travel across the galaxy in a ship running off the same thing that runs an iPod! Lana pulls one of Lex's swords off the wall and tries to be all Mulana. She says that she's not going to let him do this. Nice sneaking, Lana. Zod says that there's nothing to be afraid of: the fate of the world won't be Lana's if she gives him what he wants. "What?" she asks, still ready with the sword. "An heir," he says. Some hair? Yeah, Zod doesn't want to go the bald route with this body. Lana swings the blade. Zod easily catches her hands. He pulls Lana's right hand and pins it to a wall. He drives the sword right through her damn hand. Ouch! Lana screams and collapses. Zod says they'll talk about this later when he comes back from the Pentagon. Lana whimpers and hyperventilates. She grabs the sword with her other hand and struggles as she pulls it loose. She screams as she pulls the sword out and falls to the floor. She grits her teeth and manages to get to her feet.