Smash
Smash

Episode Report Card
Sara Brady: B | 477 USERS: B-
YOU GRADE IT
Public Enemies

Yes, Dev is now singing lead in a great big A.R. Rahman-style number that's taking place entirely in Karen's head. Rebecca's also there, lounging on a couch with the pit crew guys from RuPaul's Drag Race. I'm kind of disgusted that this is the only way the show could shoehorn in a song for Dev. I suppose next they'll give Ellis a number from The Wiz. Oh wait, Ellis is there. And he's dressed as Aladdin. Jesus, now I feel like I'm hallucinating.

The rest of the cast makes cameo appearances in Karen's fever dream: Eileen and Nick make out on a couch next to a treasure chest. Tom, after rubbing a genie's lamp, makes Sam and one of the other dancers disappear. The Shrek family looks all perfect and reconstituted, but Julia is making her "I Have a Terrible Secret!!" face. Derek feeds Ivy grapes. And then everyone throws computer-generated chrysanthemums on Dev and his chorus of Vaguely Ethnic Singing Boys and they all do The Sprinkler.

The number ends and we return to Dev and Karen, alone at the restaurant. I guess she and Rebecca aren't BFFs anymore.

Nick's apartment. Which is awesome. He has a picture of Keith Richards over the fireplace that somehow doesn't make him (Nick, not Keith) look like a poseur. Possibly because his apartment also includes tons of books on really nice built-ins. I am also really digging Eileen's new short, curly hair. Nick likes it too. He asks why Eileen ever loved Jerry, because he's such a mean little prick. She explains that she used to think his cruelty was strength and that she didn't think the strength would ever be turned against her. And I am saddened and touched, because finally I see something true in this show. "You're trading up," Nick says as he goes in to kiss her and I swear if he breaks Anjelica Huston's heart, I'll hunt him down myself.

Julia is staking out Dull Leo's school and she snags Mason, whose hairline indicates that he's about 35 and tells him if she doesn't spill his guts she'll make his life a living hell. The best part is when she enunciates, very clearly, "I'M FAMOUS" and says she'll use her famousness to get him blackballed from Choate or something. Mason doesn't buy it and Julia takes off her giant sunglasses and tearily begs, "Where is he?" Sleeping on Mason's floor, like I told you. Julia just wants to know if he's okay and Mason, wise in perfect proportion to his advanced years, observes that if he was okay, Leo wouldn't have run away, like, eight blocks.

Smash

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