Derek says he can't make her any guarantees, but Tom is amused by the idea that Derek has any offers after his recent tour through Page Six. Derek snits back that he does, and it's so nice to see these two slapfighting with each other again like ballerinas wrestling over a celery stick. Eileen boots them out of her office and Tom says he and Julia are there for her no matter what, although Derek observes that Julia has missed three meetings in a row. Tom protests that she had a college thing with Dull Leo. I hope she's sending him to the Citadel.
Ivy and Sam talk about how he's going on tour with Book of Mormon while she can't even book an eHarmony commercial (come on, Ivy, you're not nearly frumpy and sad enough to be an eHarmony beard!). Sam tells her to bug her agent and says, "At least you're not Lisa McCann" -- whom they're about to run into. They try to hide in plain sight as Ivy mutters, "I cannot face that woman. She's been plugging away longer than I have." Lisa, of course, sees them because they have not managed to make themselves invisible through sheer force of will, and squeals their names. Everyone hugs and they reminisce about working a crappy Shakespeare festival in the Adirondacks oh so many moons ago. Lisa tells them she's working in stationery now and shows them a picture of her guesthouse on her phone. Sam and Ivy manage not to choke on their suppressed rage, because they are professionals.
Derek meets with his "second-favorite agent in the world" and asks about news on The Wiz. She says Ronnie remains a fan and fought hard for him with the producers, but they're letting him go. Derek is shocked and outraged that he'd lose a job just because he slept with some actresses, but his agent says five dancers are also coming forward to accuse him of sexual harassment. Derek looks legit bewildered.
Jerry comes into Eileen's office and holds up a copy of the Observer, with a terrible editorial cartoon of Eileen. "Looks nothing like you," he laughs. He is such a dick. Eileen says she's in a tight spot and he owes her, so she wants his table at the American Theatre Wing gala because she's suddenly not on the guest list. "So, you want to be my date," Jerry says. Eileen would rather peel her face off like she did in The Witches; she says it will be just her and the creative team, even though -- as Jerry points out -- Julia is a mess and Derek just got shitcanned for being a dog. Eileen swans out. She does that so well.