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Understudy

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Sara Brady: B | Grade It Now!
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Waiting in the Wings

At Ivy's apartment, La Ivy is gesturing with a glass of red wine as she regales Sam with the seventh verse of "Why Am I Not Yet More Famous Than Whoever Is Playing Roxie Hart In Chicago These Days, Anyway?" (It's Christie Brinkley right now. Hold your breath, Ivy.) Sam holds up a magazine with Rebecca on the cover that Ivy has defaced and they giggle together as Derek arrives. Sam, smartly knowing that he can't fix any impending temper tantrums in this room with a well-timed blowjob, excuses himself so that Derek can break the news that Karen is the understudy, explaining that after Ivy's Heaven on Earth antics, there's no way she was going to get back into Bombshell. Ivy takes it pretty well actually, and I'm sure the municipal road crews will get right on that wee hellmouth that she opened up on 68th Street with the force of her fury.

In her office, Eileen is speaking some pretty terrible Spanish, and all I can catch is "cuatro [tickets] por Los Book of Mormon." (My Spanish is slightly worse than El Bloombito's.) Ellis comes in and asks where Rebecca is. Eileen points out, rightly, that if he wants a co-producer credit, maybe he should go find his bargaining-chip movie star.

Karen shows up at Dev's office to surprise him. It takes her roughly half an hour to cross the cavernous room to tell Dev her news, and they start making out on his desk. Smarmy Denby arrives and Dev introduces them, redundantly. He doesn't tell Karen that he didn't get the job, and they make out some more.

Under the marquee at On a Clear Day You Can See Forever (and across the street from Hugh Jackman, Back on Broadway! Unironic squee!), Tom and Sam discuss Ivy, because what's new, as John trails them, on the phone. Tom and John are apparently going to see a train wreck of a show called End of Daze. I prefer to think they're going to go have cocktails with Harry Connick Jr., because Broadway is about wish fulfillment, dammit. John, in his Republican-red tie, politely refrains from commenting on how Tom was totally giving Sam sex eyes.

Brooklyn, the Brownstone of Eternal Sorrow. Julia has made a grilled cheese for terrible Leo, and Shrek's absence is a yawning, gaping hole in the room. Julia says she and Shrek are going to be fine, and Leo pretends to believe her. I have almost no words for how little I care about this family.

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