So You Think You Can Dance

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Do You Hear What I Fear?

"You are a dancing fool!" proclaims Nigel, and Jarvis agrees (he's out of breath)." Mary laughs the whole time as she calls it "frantic" and says there wasn't a whole lot of clarity up there. Mia says she loved when he danced out of his shoes, and she also thought it was "brilliant" when he was slapping his own ass. Nigel says he's not a good dancer but a great entertainer. Mia blathers something about sunshine, but he's not quite good enough. Mary wants him to go through to choreography, and Nigel hems and haws while Jarvis fidgets. Finally Nigel says he'll see Jarvis in choreography, which sends Jarvis screeching, and Nigel covers her face all, "My god, what have I done?"

Then, on stage, things get even weirder, Cat tells us. Brandon Gordon, 23, of Phoenix is roughly twice the size of Nicole Peterson, 21, of Flagstaff, with whom he's dancing a ballet routine. The judges are impressed by a lift they did (or impressed that they even accomplished it at all). This leads into a montage of suck/weird with a bunch of dancers who aren't identified but aren't nearly so off the wall as to deserve comments like "how close are we to Roswell?" (Nigel) or "the spaceship has landed" (Mary). One guy has the hiccups and that apparently is really freaky and weird too. This is like -- you know what it's like? You know that annoying older woman who works in your office and goofs off most of the day and thinks there could be a sitcom based in your workplace because all the wacky joking around? That's what this is like.

Then up comes Kelsey White, 19, of Keller, Texas, who doesn't quite have the balance needed on pirouettes but has the requisite sexy gaze out through the hair falling over one eye. Nigel asks her if she has the hiccups. Nope. Nigel asks her if she's ever been kidnapped by aliens. "Just once," admits Kelsey. It's hard to tell, but she just may be serious. That's enough for Nigel, who quietly gets up from his chair and walks backstage, leaving Mary and Mia to figure out what to do. But just so they're clear, he yells "Yes to choreography!" from backstage a couple of times. Mia and Mary concur.

When Nigel comes back, Mary and Mia act like dingbats, which makes him anxious, and outside one of the auditionees says something must have been in their coffee (i.e. THEY'RE DRUNK).

We're going to wrap things up with Jonathan "Legacy" Perez, 27, of Studio City, Calif., who started dancing on the street when he was 15 and is here to share his talent with the world. It's not boasting if you can back it up, remember, and the show has already hyped his appearance by warning us he could be the best hip-hopper ever to audition. It's a lot of kicking moves at first, a very acrobatic spin, and then some amazing breakdancing. He does this crazy shuffle across the stage on the palms of his hands. Fantastic! Hip-hop has been conspicuous in its absence up to now in the first couple of episodes.

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So You Think You Can Dance

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