So You Think You Can Dance

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Wham Bam Thank you Shwam

Then we're told that Tyce has reached his breaking point. Oh, good! I guess that means he's going to start being even more ridiculous! It's a Tyce-gives-everyone-shit montage. "It was like, 'who let you out right now?'" He threatens to call the dance police on one person. I am very weary of Tyce Diorio right now.

Fortunately, it's up to Joseph Smith -- no, not the father of Mormonism. A different guy who's 20, from Orlando -- to brighten Tyce's day. Oh, no. It's one of those guys who invents a word -- in this case "shwam" -- and then bases a half-assed philosophy around it. Like he says he's going to "shwam" the judges, and Cat asks him what it means, he says it's like a quote but almost a statement, which is about when I checked out. It can be bad or good. And there's also "sha-whizz-am." That's "when you want to hold it."

So I was quite prepared to dislike him, but he's quite good, with the hippin' and the hoppin', and the bippin' and the boppin'. Nigel's quite impressed, and Joseph gives him a "shwam" or whatever the fuck, and then that has to be explained. "I look forward to the big shawham," says Nigel. I knew it!

Mary liked him too, but Tyce thought it was funny but then halfway through it was like "what are you doing?" So he was only half-impressed. I think he was just mad because Joseph was good enough not to warrant an over-the-top critique from Tyce.

It's Joseph and 31 others in the choreography round, led by Lauren from Season 3. Joseph gets his ticket, so we're going to have to hear about "shwam" some more, unfortunately, along with 17 other dancers, one of whom loses her ticket and almost has it blow away down the street on her, which made me laugh.

The next day, Wislande Letang, 21, of Miami shows up with a shirt that can't quite make it all the way over her chest. Oh, my god, she's awful. I think the money that she saved on shirt fabric is going to be needed for brass-pole disinfectant anyway. Mary alludes to as much when she says Wislande wasn't dancing for Tyce or herself, so Nigel should really be the only one critiquing her. Nigel says she wasn't really dancing any style but step-ball-change, which is what little girls do when they start learning how to dance, and Wislande is (clearly) not a little girl. Wislande says she knows it was "garbage" but she knows they can teach her, and Nigel has to point out that that's not what they do; she has to show them that she already can. Tyce tells her she's stepped into a world beyond her measure. He points out that spreading her legs and showing her crotch is really not good. She tells him that that may be true, but him looking disgusted wasn't good either. Cue flashback of him looking disgusted, and then he tries to explain that he was shocked at what he was seeing. Outside, Wislande says she's going to concentrate on school because she got a reality check.

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So You Think You Can Dance

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