Last week: Jess went home, and I learned that he had a lot more fans in the forums than I thought. Guys, don't worry about Jess. He'll be just fine. And we've got a show to watch here!
But before we begin, I want to mention that Tivo's summary of tonight's episode lists four dancers: Tadd, Marko, Ricky, and Caitlynn. I don't know how they decided which two dancers wouldn't get listed, but I think they should reconsider their system, because Sasha and Melanie should be listed first.
Cat says that next week is the finale. Really? Already? But we still haven't had a vote where the eliminated contestant is solely decided by voting! I'm not into conspiracy theories (well, not in the context of televised competitions, anyway), but I think the judges have had way too much influence over this season.
The top six are the same top six as I said earlier. Everyone gets two dances and a solo tonight. Lots of dancing! Our guest judges tonight are Christina Applegate (whose big dance credit is Sweet Charity) and Lil' C, whose apostrophe feels misplaced to me. Also Mary and Nigel. Cat has Christina give her dance resume, and she says she had lots of dance classes and has been watching this season. Oddly, I care more about whether she's been watching the show than whether she's a trained dancer. I guess that's partly because my primary qualification for commenting on the show is that I'm paying a lot of attention, not that I have some extensive dance training. Also, I should probably mention that Ms. Applegate's television show Samantha Who? had former TWoP recapper pamie as a writer. So she's okay by me. On the off-chance that she's reading this: Hi, Christina!
National Dance Day has finally happened. Katie Holmes and Twitch were involved. People submitted videos. They're awful. More tomorrow!
Melanie drew Napoleon and Tabitha, but she also got Twitch. So it kind of balances out. It's something about Red Riding Hood, apparently. Twitch is the wolf. They have a lot of trees on the stage. There's definitely more set than usual. I am distracted by the revelation that Nicki Minaj has a song where she claims to be a "Dungeon Dragon." I'm not terribly into the dance. It feels like Melanie isn't hitting it hard enough. Fans of late-1990s WCW wrestling may be interested to know that they totally rip off the spot where Billy Kidman (played by Melanie) is about to be powerbombed by a Kevin Nash-type (played by Twitch) but instead stays up on the big guy's shoulders. I mean, Melanie ends with a Hurricanrana where Kidman usually just bulldogged the guy's head to the mat, but it's pretty similar. There! Now who says I don't use enough arcane technological jargon to describe these dances? Anyway, the dance ends with Melanie leading Twitch around like a dog, and it's pretty hot.