The judges head off to deliberate, while LMFAO comes out to perform. And while, yes, they're backed by Quest, the dance crew that includes, among others, my beloved Hok from Season 3, I just can't hang with LMFAO. Particularly not this lip-synching mess. If you pardon me, I'll be over here in the corner, fretting.

After the break, the sure-to-be-wrenching results. Nigel claims the decisions are unanimous. After shining on Missy and Iveta, Nigel surprises me by dinging Ryan's solo. (This kind of happens all the time when I try to guess how Nigel will evaluate solos. Probably because Nigel spins a wheel under the desk that tells him how to react to a given solo.) He thinks there's more that she can give. The person the judges have decided to KEEP is: Ryan. Of course it is. You guys, this isn't going to help my trying-to-like-Ryan problem. Marko is in tears AS SHOULD WE ALL BE. Iveta and Missy take it like total pros, and their Dancer's Journey videos, as always, make me sad.

Now the boys: Nigel gives Wadi the "we haven't seen what you can do" critique that he gave Ryan, which has to give him some hope, considering. I have to say, though, I'm not feeling this "Poor you, you pulled the cha-cha." Dancers have been tasked with the cha-cha for seven seasons now, and we've never given them a pass for it. It's a style; one of the many styles this show asks its dancers to take on. No free passes. As for Nick, Nigel notes that the two tap dancers on the panel could work out in his favor. Nigel REALLY liked Ricky's solo, which is why they're keeping him.

EXCUSE ME I NEED A MINUTE.

Nope. I'm not ready to be done with Nick Young yet. Or any of these people! When Nigel made his little power play last week, how could I have known it'd mean the elimination of two of my three favorite pairs from last week?? They couldn't have at least combined last week's vote totals with this week's? Iveta and Nick's ridiculous quickstep has to count for NOTHING?

No, this one's gonna stew for a while yet. See you all on Wednesday, when I may or may not be over it.

Joe R doesn't want to talk about it. Questions, comments, and unadulterated love can be sent to him at joseph.reid21@gmail.com.